How To Treat a Ladyboy - Hints and Tips

[deepthroat]

GREAT responses Doug and all.

OZ, stop being a dick. When I see an asshole on the freeway, ok, there's an asshole on the freeway. But when I spend the whole morning bitching and moaning about all the assholes on the freeway, it's a pretty good indication that I'M the one with the problem, and not the other drivers. You become what you focus upon. So unless you want to become Billy you probably ought to stop obsessing on him, or keep it to yourself and away from the boards please.

Getting back to Doug's great insights - I had a nasty experience here in the States a few years back. I was at a very low period in my life and decided I'd fallen in love with a P4P girl here. Of course it ended badly (at least for me it did). It was insane and taught me a huge lesson. For some of us, there is a lure in the idea of "saving" a girl from her circumstance; the girls here often call those men "Captain Save-A-Hoe's". For myself, I believe what drove me was a lack of esteem. The reality is that esteem can only come from performing esteemable acts. Trying to change the circumstances of a P4P girl is not in that category, as I had to find out the hard way. For me it led to a reckoning that was overdue and now, from the vantage point of a fear years on the other side, very much needed.  

Fantasies of marrying a Thai Bargirl? D-A-N-G-E-R Will Robinson! Doug has captured that to the "t" in his responses.

Thanks for all the great input.

[newwriter]

I've written this before but I can't agree with other BM's views on Private Dancer. I think it's poorly written trash designed only to titillate and offering little or no insight whatsoever.

So there.

[Ozzie]

(deepthroat @ Jan. 02 2009,16:17) OZ, stop being a dick. When I see an asshole on the freeway, ok, there's an asshole on the freeway. But when I spend the whole morning bitching and moaning about all the assholes on the freeway, it's a pretty good indication that I'M the one with the problem, and not the other drivers. You become what you focus upon. So unless you want to become Billy you probably ought to stop obsessing on him, or keep it to yourself and away from the boards please.

You don't have to read what I write in fact there is a little ignore button at the top of each post by me. Feel free to use it.

This a forum and without peoples on opinions on different subjects it would be a very boring place.

Also if you think I am obsession with Billy you are just as delusional as he is.

[doug]

I did think of a few "hints" to help newbies get on a girl's good side:

1) Save up.

If you're independently wealthy. Good for you (and can you spare a few hundred thousand baht for me too?)

But if you're like me and work for a living, then instead of hitting the clubs every week (or night), save up and treat yourself to a big night out every month or two.

The logic being that if you're focused on getting in and out of a bar/ST-hotel with a girl for less than 1000 baht, you're NOT focusing on having a good time with the girl.

That makes you boring and annoying.

Of course, if you're one of those guys who goes to a fancy restaurant just to fill up on free bread and water (and leaving the pissed off and harassed waiter some spare change as a tip), then this hint will probably fall on deaf ears, because you're what's known as a "prick".

I'm not suggesting you take your paycheck and spend your rent money pretending to be a rock star (I've seen guys like that in strip clubs before, and the harpies flock to them like sharks smelling blood in the water). Trust me, you're not going to have any fun with those girls milking you either.

I've seen guys walk into a bar, cash their paycheck at the bar, and then spend it all. Sure, for a little while they'll have five or six girls hovering around them, but the MINUTE they spend their last coin, those girls get up and walk away. And the expressions on their faces? They look EXACTLY like someone who's just punched a clock after a long day in a factory. It's their JOB to get you to spend your paycheck, they DO NOT think you're "cool" and they WILL NOT like you better for it. Period.

Instead, count off a comfortable budget for the night, put that in your wallet and leave the ATM/credit cards at home. Once you've put money at the back of your mind, you'll be able to relax and have a good time. That's why you went out in the first place, right?

Guys who are having fun ARE FUN to hang with. Sure, you may not look like G'Pimp'n'Daddy, but who cares? Nobody in the bar thinks you're "cool" if you buy a bottle of champagne for six girls. They all think you're a SAP for giving the bar an obscene amount of money for a bottle of sparkling fruit juice (which the girls all pour into the ice bucket when you're not watching).

Maybe some guys get off on that, but I'd rather have one nice conversation with a sweet girl than have six harpies pawing me for 30 minutes.

2) Lie.

I'll carp on this point ad nauseum and some punters will still ignore me (and pay the price). Simple rule: No personal details (real names), no home addresses/phone numbers, and never open the package .

Play safe and you can relax and have a good time.

After all, what's the point of having a good time with a girl if it means you're going to have to put up with three weeks of late night drunken-screaming visits, dozens of jealousy SMS's and other ladyboy drama? Keep the barlife in the bar, ALWAYS.

3) Don't lie.

Yeah, I know what I just said. But this time I'm talking about stuff like "Oh, I can't buy you a lady drink, I'm here to meet a friend..." or "I'm not a butterfly, I love only you baby", etc...

If you tell some pushy girl a lie just to get her off you or if you lead some trusting girl on just to get freebie sex from her, you're going to build up negative ladyboy karma and that's not a good thing.

It WILL come back to bite you. Trust me.

Instead, just be up-front and honest about everything (except personal details).

If you're not interested in that pushy Amazon, just say so, straight up. They may give a little huffy tiff, but that's nothing compared to the treatment you'll get from them if you barfine another girl immediately after you told her you were just "looking around".

For example, I get regular booty calls from one of the popular ATS models (when she's not down in Singapore making real money), and she'll always ask which girls I've seen lately. I don't lie or try to convince her that "she's the only one for me". First off, she'd know that's bullshit, and secondly, she knows every girl I'm going to sleep with before I know I'm going to sleep with them. So why bother playing games?

We all know the deal, so let's keep it real.

4) Don't play for the Freebie, EVER.

Girls sniff that bullshit from a mile away. You're going to get an instantly hostile reaction from most girls, or worse, if you do manage to play a girl for a freebie, she's going to think you're serious about her and latch onto you like a bad rash.

When I go out to my favorite pub, the owner will sometimes buy me a round of drinks. But I'd never go to the pub expecting him to let me drink the rail for free. That'd be downright rude. So why do some guys think they can pull that stunt with a P4P girl? You seriously think she hasn't seen your game before, playa? She's seen it HUNDREDS of times before. You've got ZERO chance of playing any non-drug-addict girl whose worked the bars for more than three months.

And if taking advantage of new girls and drug addicts is your thing, you're a scumbag, and I hope that when you're crossing the street, you get run over by cancer.

Guys who try to play girls for free sex are more annoying than taxi-drivers who ASK for a tip.

But if some girl decides to comp you sex for the night, say "thanks" and appreciate it. Genuinely. Don't read too much into it either. If WalMart gives you a coupon for a free toaster, that doesn't mean that WalMart "really loves you." They just like your business and want you to become a repeat customer. Get it?

5) Thoughtful gifts.

If you become a regular customer for one particular girl, a nice gift every now and then is part of the fun (for both of you).

Big expensive gifts (like *cough* air-cons *cough*) say: "I'm a cash cow, please milk me."

Jewelry and watches say: "I'm a playboy and I can't put much thought into this, so here's the same thing I got six other girls last time I was in Thailand".

Mobile phones say: "I have no self-esteem and I want to listen to you talk to your other boyfriends/customers while we're eating/watching a movie/fucking."

Designer purses say: "I want you to go back to the bar and prance around, showing it off to all the other girls, so they can demand I get them one too!"

Instead, let your inner gay-boy out to play when you go shopping and look for something a ladyboy might actually LIKE. For example, a Hello Kitty jewelry box or a nice scarf on a cold day. Or you could offer to take her to a nail salon or treat her to one of those horribly sappy Korean dramas.

Of course, if you've been "dating" her regularly, you should know her tastes and that'll help guide you. Some girls are only pacified by shiny baubles, while other girls might like a new game for their PSP. She's your "girlfriend", you figure it out.

Heck, one time I got a ladyboy a Monopoly board game and she LOVED it (and you haven't lived until you've played strip-Monopoly with three ladyboys).

As a general rule, any girl who ASKS for a gift is done with me. That's a non-starter and I kick her to the curb immediately (after I fuck her, of course).

If I'm going for the GFE, then I want the EXPERIENCE of buying a present that I think she'll like and the EXPERIENCE of seeing her open it and enjoy it. That's what I'm paying for, after all.

I do not see gifts as a way to win her favor or get a discount. Buying her a gift is something I do for MY enjoyment, because I like being nice to girls I like.

If it becomes an expectation or if she doesn't appreciate it, then I no longer enjoy the experience and I get off that ride.

To sum it all up, just try to remember that you're supposed to be having FUN. If you're finding yourself focusing too much on money or embroiling yourself in "ladyboy drama" you're going about this whole thing the wrong way.

I know some guys are sex addicts and look at P4P as a slow, chicken-shit form of suicide. And I know some guys are Cheap Charlies who part with their pennies as if they were kidneys. And I know other guys have low self-esteem and think that getting a P4P girl to "love" them will boost it (it doesn't). And I know some guys are just assholes who don't see the point of being "nice" to a "lesser" human being (basically everyone else).

So for those guys, these tips are going to seem like a whole lot of pointless drivel. They are either in the "get-dick-wet-fast-and-often" mode or they are totally deluding themselves about what the P4P scene REALLY is about.

All I can say about that is: "Karma's a bitch boys."

But for any newbies who are sincerely looking for ways to treat the girls right, my first tip is still the best advice I can give you: "Be a good customer, and they'll like you (as a customer). 100% guaranteed."

[f0xxee]

One more hint.

take a couple of business cards from someone you hate and pass them out.

revenge is a bitch.

[jimslim]

Some well thought out tips there  

Just being yourself and being sensible in what you are doing works every time , don't forget these girls have seen every type of guy , the good the bad and the ugly , the decent guys from the clowns , the cheap charlies and the ones who want to throw money around like confetti ,guys who treat them like human beings to those who look down on them .

Keep your feet firmly on the ground and have fun  

I liked the bit about naked monopoly , I once played something that resembled naked twister with 2 girls (minus the board )
Now if I could only remember what happened , I think it was fun  

[jimslim]

(newwriter @ Jan. 02 2009,17:06) I've written this before but I can't agree with other BM's views on Private Dancer. I think it's poorly written trash designed only  to titillate and offering little or no insight whatsoever.

Some guys quote this book like the bible , its a work of fiction full of every cliche there is about Thailand .

The general theme of falling for a go go dancer and getting burned , well we hardly need a book to tell us that's gonna happen .

And piss off a hooker at your peril , there's a Thai hitman on every corner , come on , there wouldn't be many of us left would there

[doug]

(jimslim @ Jan. 02 2009,21:49) I liked the bit about naked monopoly

Take it from me, ladyboys get hardcore about that monopoly money. They do NOT fuck around , and they will NEVER miss a chance to collect rent. Haha!

Some of the best times I've had with ladyboys have been those goofy moments when we're just palling around.

Guys who are totally focused on nickel-and-diming these girls miss out on that experience.

To me, that's like going snorkelling in Phuket, but spending the whole time in the boat haggling the fare with the driver instead of in the water swimm'n wid da fishies.

Sure, they still get to go for a boat ride, but they miss out on 90% of the fun because they're too focused on how much it'll cost and whether or not someone got a better deal.

[f0xxee]

About Private dancer....

Yeah its cliched. (Did I spell that right?) But aren't cliches the truth if only over used?
And the revenge he visited upon his whore... well lets face it... he gave her and her family a comparitively massive financial burden and huge huge loss of face... not just her... her family.

there is a differnce between pissing anyone off and ruining their family.

I would advise seriously against it.

Oh.. and I did note that it was cynical and not particularly well written. everyone in the book is horrible!

[Stogie]

PINNED! What a great thread... Thanks Doug and everyone ese...

[doug]

thanks stogie, but really this stuff is just common sense. some guys just lose their minds around these girls, that's all.

cheers!

[TTChang]

(doug @ Jan. 03 2009,08:49) thanks stogie, but really this stuff is just common sense.  

Ah  .. that rare commodity ....often left abandoned in the arrivals hall at Suvarnabhumi      I remember it well ..... see my first trip report!  Some guys just need to suffer a bit - before they understand what Doug knows  

[BAM]

(aperry @ Jan. 01 2009,09:37) Private Dancer is Course 101 for us mongers and should be required reading before stepping off the plane in LOS!!

Private Dancer can be found here for free...



http://www.pattayapages.com/girls/im...ate-dancer.pdf

[newwriter]

(BAM @ Jan. 03 2009,14:03) Private Dancer can be found here for free...

Value for money anyway

[petesie]

Excellent advice Doug.........but like the man said.....common sense is often tossed aside once the beer goggles are in roaming mode and there's a lump in yer troosers...........

Dougs words...........Pearls of Wisdom here chaps.....