How to get rid of a woman who wants to marry you

[Guest]

I don't speak chicken shit.

I am just absolutely flabbergasted by people who have never learned any sense of independance.

About once a month someone shows up on the board who has no fucking clue. What the hell?

Rant off.

[Guest]

GTSL,(I like this short version)

Sorry I've been out of the forum for a while, been vacationing in Thailand; which you won't be able go if you get into this marriage.(I'm showing you another consequence)

From one rice burner to another: Better to do nothing then to jump in to this "marriage". Please, Please... learn from my mistake. I jumped into a marriage(not to a Chinese), and jumped out just as quickly. It's not the jumping in, but the jumping out that's most traumatic. Take it from me, you don't want to do that. The psychological depression I felt was murder.

RR's suggestion to talk to the girl sounds like a good idea. Even if she react negatively, you are still one step ahead, or one step away from a marriage.

JUST DO IT! Sorry, Stogie, for the CAPs.

Here's more incentive: If you don't get marry, I'll show you Thailand, ie. lovely girls!! Promise! More enticement in picture forum.

Ronin

[jackc]

Lost in all these posts so far is the mention of the four letter word called "LOVE". Isn't marriage ultimately about love? If it is, and IMHO, it better fucking well be, shouldn't it be easy enough to tell the girl that you simply DO NOT LOVE HER. You do not see yourself spending 2 months with her, let alone eternity (marriage will feel like eternity, trust me, I've been married 10 years now). So, short of using religion, work, politics, avoidance etc etc, why not just tell her (and your parents) that you simply DO NOT LOVE HER. If that does not do the trick, you have one psycho christian chick there, and man do you want to avoid that shite like the biblical plague.

Alternatively, you can just run away to LOS and never come back. As they say, "up to you". Good luck, and by the way, I'm chinese too, and do understand to a certain degree the cultural psychological warfare parents can wage on their off springs. Been there, and have seen them off.

[Guest]

(jackc @ Jun. 02 2006,01:02) Lost in all these posts so far is the mention of the four letter word called "LOVE". Isn't marriage ultimately about love? If it is, and IMHO, it better fucking well be, shouldn't it be easy enough to tell the girl that you simply DO NOT LOVE HER. You do not see yourself spending 2 months with her, let alone eternity (marriage will feel like eternity, trust me, I've been married 10 years now). So, short of using religion, work, politics, avoidance etc etc, why not just tell her (and your parents) that you simply DO NOT LOVE HER. If that does not do the trick, you have one psycho christian chick there, and man do you want to avoid that shite like the biblical plague.

Alternatively, you can just run away to LOS and never come back. As they say, "up to you". Good luck, and by the way, I'm chinese too, and do understand to a certain degree the cultural psychological warfare parents can wage on their off springs. Been there, and have seen them off.

You can be honest without telling the whole story; ie, you can tell her you don't want to get marry with her, without telling her you prefer ladyboys. There are other reasons: I don't like to be railroad into anything, I learn that marriage is not for me from watching my parents- OUcH.

The most important thing to remember is say "I don't want to be marry to YOu." You must make your message clear, and make sure there is no misunderstanding.

I feel for you. You have some hard work ahead of you, or you can make it easy- do it once, and do it right the first time.

Ronin

[Road Runner]

Hello Goingtosugarland,

My comment about Thailand will make more sense after you have been there   .
(The rough translation is - you have the money - you decide what we do).  Forget it though  -  it's really just a throw away comment.

Like I said in my previous post  -  take the girl to neutral ground (away from your house) and tell her you Don't want to get married.  There is no easy way to do this.

But you can try to lay the scenario out before you come to the crunch  -  as I mentioned above.
Remember women's minds work differently so if she has any sense she will work out what you are saying about half way through.
If not she's probably too thick to bother with anyway  

If you do it the right way (and she is not stupid!)  -  she will be on your side  -  if not you will have to explain to your parents.
At some stage you will have to do this anyway!  If you work it the right way the girl will end up doing this for you  

Putting this off is more hassle to you  -  and is not fair to the girl.  OK I (sort of) understand your obligation to your parents  -  but it's you living your life   -  not them!

RR.

[Guest]

to everybody.
But I must say, you are mistaking if you are still trying to tell me just stand my ground and understand this is my own life, yadiyadiyada.
I knew this already.
No I don't give a fuck if someone jump off the building tomorroww and for the comments on me being "17". No you got it all wrong. I am not asking for a rally call to give me courage. I might have talked about how I got to this point - but this mother fucker is not how he was before. The question I am asking is really a tactical one. I need this 2 months. I don't want to get a drama. If they started crying and shouting and acting hurt they may not leave at all. What am I gonna do? abandon my own house. I am dealling with some real fucked up situations here. It's not that I am not independant, it's two retarted morons basically have no other things but bothering with my life. What am I gonna do? I can't call the cops on them. The rest of the world wouldn't sympathize with me. I bet you right now bunch of people reading this post shaking their heads "how can he talk about his parents like that?" So I don't have other choice but getting really tactical about it. I need it to be smooth. I need this two people go back to where the fuck they are from and tell them on the phone, Now if there is any drama I don't have to deal with it. They have been here for a whole month and I have just destroyed my lung yelling at them. They just won't back down. Every day I go home they will be standing by he garage like two idiots trying to talk to me. Why can't they get lives of their own and stop bothering me? Isn't it too late to ask that question?
Don't have to tell me about marriage. I ain't going to have people living with me. I hate that shit. I need to walk around naked and I hate people talking while I watch the games. So you don't need to tell me, still appreciate the effort though. I think RR has the best idea so far. I also feel I don't need another person join this muddy shit. So might as well tell her asap. If she decide to fuck up my two month buffer... man, I guess I have taken worse shit before ....

[Guest]

About "coming out" - I just have to do it. There is no stop without me taking it all the way. Agin, I need that two months, but I have to do it. All you people think I can just "stand my ground" without going into details do not know my parents. You can't teach them the idea of personal space. To be free, I have to break their hearts. There no getting around it.
In my late 20's, I tried. I would be shouting at them on the phone just repeating I just have no interest in marriage. If they were here I drove the old man to tears all the time. And then I guess I got used to be cold blodded. And they still didn't give up. So I finally came up with the fucking geniouse idea - told them I was dating someone. I thought this would shut them up. No, they keep pushing. And now they are coming to see the girl. So I got to fake a breakup. Now they thought I was close once, they figured there is "hope". Hence the set-ups. Yes, there were more than once. I usually just went out and curse at other drivers, picked my noses, told dirty jokes. Worked out very well. None of them wanted to see me again. But this woman seems to be very determined. I am a little worried. Plus, I am tired of even playing these games.

[Torurot]

FIRST you have to dump the girl (nicely but firmly), because she will be running flanker for your parents (like mutual encouragement society) then if you have any other brothers & sisters sic your parents on them. If not, sign them up at the local Mahjong club so they have something to do all day/night. AT this point there is no need to tell them you like LB, but if nothing else works... two months is not that long. Dump the girl!

[Guest]

Just want to clear one thing so I don't accidentally label others as freaks. The girl did not fly all the way here to find a husband (then again, what's so freaky about that, we fly all the way just to fuck). She is here because her sister just had a baby. But figure she can get this thing done too. I never met her in person but will today. If she is half decent to reason with, I will try RR's approach and talk to her.

[dummy_plug]

If you've never met her in person, then I don't see what the problem is? It really wouldn't be all that difficult, or unexpected, to get out of a "relationship" with a girl you've never even met.

[Guest]

I have never seen a man so pussy whipped by his parents before.

You don't think you can tell them to leave your house? You act like they have a right to stay and you are at a disadvantage. Do you think they will stay in your house after you tell them to leave and just stop talking to them?

You are messed up in the head. You need to see a therapist. You've been under the apron so long you can't even remember what it looks like to see the sunlight.

Jesus, I thought my life was fucked up. Now I feel like the king of the world.

[vangough05]

Take this from a man who has been pussy whipped twice and been diviorced twice and fucked very hard and longggggggg twice Put agun to your head and pull the trigger. Or u can do it the easy way and stand up for your self and tell em all to get fucked, get a life and eat my crotch. Worked for me, now I have money, happiness and peace of mind. I travel when I want, fuck when I want, whinge and moan when I want and answer to no cunt. Hop on a plane to LOS, live alot for little for a few weeks, buy Stoogie and the boys adrink and thank fuck for small mercys. Be alive my friend and don't let no cunt tell u what u have to or dont have to do

[Guest]

(grunyen @ Jun. 04 2006,00:18) I have never seen a man so pussy whipped by his parents before.

You don't think you can tell them to leave your house?  You act like they have a right to stay and you are at a disadvantage.  Do you think they will stay in your house after you tell them to leave and just stop talking to them?

You are messed up in the head. You need to see a therapist. You've been under the apron so long you can't even remember what it looks like to see the sunlight.

Jesus, I thought my life was fucked up. Now I feel like the king of the world.

I don't know what the fuck you get on my ass for? Did you fucking read? I am doing exactly what you are preaching, I just don't come out shouting cursing words (except for this time), now tell us what you have done so brave?
Yes, the plan is to ask them to get out, and the plan is to ask them to back off. But your "respectfully and firmly" approach won't work. I kept saying that? God, is there something so insecured in you that you have to prove?
They have a plan to leave, all of them. I just need to make sure they leave and THEN tell them not to come back? How the heck do you know I have not tried the "firm and respectful" approach before?
Yes, you are still fucked up and if not for that money can be better spent on beer and dick, I would pay for your therapist.

[Guest]

You don't think you can tell them to leave your house? You act like they have a right to stay and you are at a disadvantage. Do you think they will stay in your house after you tell them to leave and just stop talking to them?

Yes they will. It's not what I think, I know. And you don't know them. So back the fuck off, to your own dark corner and get macho on your imaginary obstacles.

[Guest]

(grunyen @ Jun. 04 2006,00:18) I have never seen a man so pussy whipped by his parents before.

You don't think you can tell them to leave your house?  You act like they have a right to stay and you are at a disadvantage.  Do you think they will stay in your house after you tell them to leave and just stop talking to them?

You are messed up in the head. You need to see a therapist. You've been under the apron so long you can't even remember what it looks like to see the sunlight.

The only really smart thing so far said on this subject.

It's time to be forceful and take control of your life. If you are pushing 30 and your parents are waiting outside YOUR house for you to come back from work so they can twist your life around then pack their bags and drive them home.

Do you really think that this will resolve itself if you can just stop from shooting someone for two months?

As for marrying people you have never met - well that is an insane move by any rational thinking person.

Sound like typical religeous folk, though!