Long term '1 on 1' with the ideal ladyboy?

[stogie bear]

So you meet the idea ladyboy...

You're out shopping for a shirt at the mall and in a restaurant having something to eat on her lunch break from her office job is a beautiful ladyboy.

Actually - you're not even sure she is a ladyboy, you more like hope that she is!

Through the glass you make eye contact with her and she turns away shyly but hides an approving giggle.

For the first time in your life... well - for a long time - youwalk back past the restaurant in the mall a few minutes later and again she notices you outside with your bag of shopping.

You're wishing you had shaved and put on proper clothes by now, but there she is with a couple of her friends giggling over her noodles!

On a whim you pull out your business card and walk into the restaurant. You go up to her table and introduce yourself. You hand her your card and leave quickly, flushed and very embarrarsed. It's been a while since you did something rash like that!

One month on and you've been out a few times. She's great. She's educated, her English is good, her family are middle class and she doesn't need your money at all...

Her parents live and work at good jobs in the city but she shares an apartment with her friend.

By now you've slept with her a few times and although she's quite shy she's very enthusiastic and seems to really enjoy having sex with you... especially after a glass of white wine!

She doesn't smoke or drink (well - the odd glass!) and she's in her early twenties. She's never been to a ladyboy bar in her life and would be very offended if you took her to one...

To top it all she looks absolutely fantastic. Slim, feminine and pretty...

Could you live with a girl like this?

(Actually - you can vary your own personal scenarios, but the point is - you have met your perfect partner... she likes you just as much... are you capable of foresaking all others and your way of life, maybe, just for her?)

[daveduke007]

I voted the top one

[Guest]

stogie this is Hollywood pap........
have you been watching a few chick flicks over the weekend

saying that i voted number 1 and that bird sounds like my ideal lb

[Guest]

The regulars know that I am seeing a particular LB on a 1 to 1 basis but mine relationship with her was very unexpected too. It was never planned and I only dated occasional LB's and NEVER even thought of dating one on a regular basis.
In fact, I had a conversation with a few regulars when I first moved to Bangkok a few months ago about if I dated only LB's or both and I was a definite "BOTH" person.
I met my current girlfriend about 2 months ago and we started out as very good friends and we have taken it a lot deeper than either she or I ever expected. We were just discussing it this past weekend when we were away on holiday.
Is she great as a girlfriend, probably one of the best I have ever had. Is she slim, feminine and pretty....yeah, I'd say so and so haven't a few others. She is very well educated, I've seen the degrees she has and she doesn't need money either, so it's never been a money attractant. Hell, I'm not rich! She has a great family whom I've met and spend every weekend with and they treat me like family.
When I look at the current relationship I'm in, I don't see a LB as my girlfriend; I see a woman who is beautiful and sexy, who is a devout Buddhist that doesn't have a mean bone in her body. She has decided to change her life and put it into a different and more positive direction and is being very successful with doing it. I'm so friggen proud of her I want to jump and down every time I see her and think about what she's done so far.
I have been married before so I'm not quick to jump into being married again but I could easily marry a LB like the one I have now if I did decide to one day take the plunge once again.
Nhscotsman

[Stewart]

Mr NHScotsman

If I have got you mixed up with someone else, then I apologise in advance.

But didn't you start a long thread 6 months ago about moving to Thailand to teach English to be near your Thai GF and little boy?

If that was you, then what happened to all that?

Am I missing something?

[jimslim]

I thought that also
and this must be the first post where you have forgot to mention you are 6"4

[stogie bear]

Maybe he's shrunk a bit...

[Monkey]

(stogie bear @ Nov. 12 2007,13:22) Actually - you're not even sure she is a ladyboy, you more like hope that she is!

Through the glass you make eye contact with her and she turns away shyly but hides an approving giggle.

That's where it would end for me I'm afraid.

I would think she is a GG then carry on walking...

OK I'll play along and vote no.1 (well, I can dream as much as the rest of you guys)



p.s. did something happen to you since Sunday Stogie? You've gone from Mr. Grumpy to Barbara Cartland...

[thegame925]

This is a subject that comes up regularly, the difference this time is that it has started with a Poll.

A relationship with an LB is no different than a relationship with anybody, anyone, or anything.

I have written about this before, so long-term members should skip this post and move on.

I was once married (divorced 20 years ago), and have 4 children and 8 grandchildren living in different parts of the world.

During my marriage and after my divorce, I was serially unfaithful with women, both in terms of affairs, one night stands and (as I got older) p4p.

Some 16 years ago, I met a Hong-Kong based, part-Chinese/part-Malay lady trainee- lawyer (age 21), in a Hong Kong lawyer's office, whom I asked out and who, on the fourth date, after being invited to my hotel room, turned out to have a "surprise" in her panties.

That was my first ever TS experience €“ From that date a true relationship developed. We were together (living together) over 9 years.

During that time she qualified as a lawyer, travelled with me when our schedules permitted. She met all my children and my ex-wife and her second husband.

I did not tell my children that my partner was an LB on the first meeting, only after each of then got to know her.

Our friends were a cross section of ex-pats and locals within the communities in which we moved, and my partner had friends, straight men, gay men, women, and LB friends, a few of those LB's were "on the game", but the majority of them led that which we would consider to be "normal" lives, in "normal" jobs.

Obviously, during those 9+ years I learned a great deal about the TS/LB mentality €“ how some (my partner for instance) €“ liked their equipment and how others wanted to cut it off.

There are as many variations of the psyche in LB's as there are in the standard male and female minds.

Unfortunately, my partner took ill with cancer (albeit not related to her breast implants). I quit my job and we went round the world on a search for a miracle cure.

Nearly 12 months after the first diagnosis, she passed away. Because we tried to find a cure for her illness in so many countries, I not only lost my job, but the costs of travel, hospitals and treatment took most of my savings.

During the years we were together I was never once unfaithful, and I do not believe she was unfaithful either.

After her passing, I left Hong Kong (I found her parents "suffocating") I was sad for a year, then "picked myself up" , dated girls and came to Thailand and had a few p4p TS's, for "one night stands" and very short relationships . This was over a 2 year period.

Then, one bright morning, in Singapore, whilst waiting in the reception area of an Accountant's office, I fancied the receptionist (part-Malay/part-Thai) whom I recognized as TS. I asked her out, she accepted.

We met at a bar; she said "I have to tell you something". I said touched her Adam's apple and told her she did not need to tell me anything and that I knew she was TS.

We dated for a couple of months, she was 22 years old, and then I was assigned to a job in Australia. I asked her if she wanted to accompany me. She did. We went to Australia together.

This was a "romance" where she got an education at college, an Australian visa and played college student and housewife. In return, I got a permanent, youthful, attractive, intelligent "live-in" TS girlfriend. But, in all honesty, whilst we were friends and lovers, we were not "in love" with each other - the "big spark" was never there.

Then I was transferred to Chile (where I could not take her and she would not have wanted to go) and so I let her stay in Australia in my (rented) apartment until the end of the lease (11 months) and graduate from college the following year. I had paid for tuition etc in advance.

We kept in touch over the next two years, she dated men nearer her age, and one man in particular encouraged her to have reassignment surgery. In July 2006 she had the "final cut" and her boy-friend asked her to marry him.

She had no parents (they died when she was a teenager) and I was invited to "give her away" at her wedding in December 2006, which I duly did and wrote about in a Trip Report in January 2007.

Incidentally, apropos the girl in Australia, two of my children met her a couple of times, and again accepted her without question. I guess I am kind of proud that I (or more honestly, my ex-wife) raised kids who are totally non-judgmental.

I am currently not in a relationship, mainly because it is impossible to meet attractive companions where I am working.

When in major cities I do indulge in "pay4play" occasionally, (and only with TS's - an expensive hobby at European & American rates) but I have not yet met anyone from that background with whom I could see myself having a "permanent" relationship.

I am really past the age when I should have retired, but I need the money to maintain my lifestyle and provide for the future.

However, I do believe that it is possible to meet a TS/LB and have a relationship, provided that the two of you are in the same city €“ it will not work at thousands of miles distance. (I, like most experienced afficianados, can tell you hundreds of stories of how the internet has sustained the market for "mother's operation"; new oxen; eye surgery on little brothers, etc., etc.)

Looking towards retirement, I want to live in a major city in the USA or Europe and to travel internationally; I have no desire live on a beach in Thailand.

My preference is that I would like to meet a young, bright, intelligent, attractive, pre-op TS who was confident in her femininity and persona - a person who would enjoy being "spoiled and educated" by an older man - who could become interested in art, music (of all types), travel, food, wine, movies, - who, in time and given compatibility, would enjoy travel, etc.

If my preference was for Amazonian blonde GG's, I could go to Eastern Europe and find a young beauty €“ Would that relationship be any more "natural"? My predilection happens to be for Asian pre-op LB's (and I am a top €“ not versatile at all).

I fully recognise that whether my partner is a GG or an LB, that partner will not be with me for my aged body, my looks, or anything other than the lifestyle I can provide.

I know I am not "Brad Pitt", but, from past experience, I know that there are things that a young person can get from an older person and vice-versa that makes both sides feel that they have made a fair bargain.

We all need to fully appreciate that there is a cost implication in any relationship.

If anyone thinks relationships don't carry a financial cost, then they are not living on this (or any other) planet.

A wife costs - and a divorce can cost more than living with her
A child (one's own) costs to rear him/her
A dog costs (collars, leashes, food, vets)
A girl-friend costs (dinners, theatres, hotels, petrol)
A cow costs, (hay, water,) - but OK you can eat it in the end and there is a dividend by way of milk
So we all know what the bar-fine is and yes, relationships cost more than a short time session or a one-night stand.
I've "butterflied" with the best of them €“ and, over many decades, I've had plenty of one-night-stands on both an amateur and a p4p basis.

In my twenties and thirties I could not understand p4p. All I knew is that I felt I could have any woman I wanted whenever I walked into any room, anywhere.
At my age I walk into a room and although I might physically take up space, I might as well be invisible.

I am no longer a physically attractive proposition to anyone of any sex (other than widows and divorcees of certain age) unless I start picking my teeth with an Amex Centurion Black Card, and even then I might have difficulty without a "follow-spotlight" shining on the card!

I am yesterday's man and the only action likely to come my way of the type to which I am attracted, is, initially, on a p4p basis.

I do hope that once we have passed that initial encounter, my charm, prowess and a lifetime of experiences might strike a chord which might lead to something more.

I do know from those experiences and from the experience of others that a relationship with anyone (GG or LB) who has been an escort has certain special problems, not least of which is the constant suspicion of the male partner that his partner will revert to their old ways.

Jealousy and lack of trust are the biggest problems in relationships.

A relationship will only succeed where there is honest communication and commitment by both parties.

That said, the question raised was about whether on can have a relationship with a Ladyboy, and I have attempted to give an answer based on experience.

I have also had relationships with a wife, with children, with girl-friends, with dogs (the four-legged barking canine variety), employers, employees, bank managers, business partners, and a few bartenders, etc.

Truthfully, the best and longest relationship I have had has been with myself and the only thing that has never left me unsatisfied is my right hand (which I have also used for writing cheques).

My next best relationship was with a ladyboy and, before anyone makes the point, had she lived another decade or so and was a 40 year old ladyboy, would I look on the relationship the same way? €“ I am afraid I could not answer that hypothetical question.

In my heart of hearts, sadly, I expect I would have moved on.

But hey guys, there is tons of material within this Forum of the risks and rewards of relationships with LB's, and if one enters into any relationship with ones eyes wide open and a determination to make that reationship work, then yes, happiness can be achieved.

[rxpharm]

thegame925 has it pegged.

Any relationship whether it be with gg, lb, business partner, etc. has a cost because you have to invest yourself in it.

The chance of success depends on the two parties willing to work at it.

One cannot categorically state that relationships with all lbs will fail, just as you cannot say all relationships with ggs fail (though divorce stats don't look good for relationships with ggs).

What is the key for success? Really there is no magic formula or someone would have published it, sold it and made millions from promoting it. However, certainly some things may make it more likely - compatibility, the desire of both partners to make it work, chemistry and a whole host of intangibles.

Good luck for all those make the attempt and as a famous board member says: Be careful out there!

Almost forgot to mention, I voted for no. 1 - if the right one came along, yes, I would hope it could work out, and would like to make the effort to try and succeed.

[jimslim]

The thing is in LOS there is just too much choice , too much temptation .......
I remember well my very first trip to LOS , I met a stunning GG who was simply the cutest girl Id ever seen in my life , but after 2 days I felt bored and felt like I was missing out , so I had to say goodbye .
The only way it could work for me would be to live on a nice island like Samui or Koh Panyang with my beautiful LB .
I can just imagine living in Pattaya or BKK and staggering home some night , out of the shadows creeps some strumpet dressed in a pair of shorts hardly covering her cheeks , "where you go handsome man ?"
oh dear oh dear game over , then back home the next morning to the teerak to get a wok over my head or the little man who got me into trouble cut off  

[gizmo]

I voted for option 3, GG or LB, it alway's happens after
a few month's I cant help it, I guess I'm a slut!

[Monkey]

(gizmo @ Nov. 12 2007,19:32) I voted for option 3, GG or LB, it alway's happens after
a few month's I cant help it, I guess I'm a slut!

naaah, it's just that you haven't met the right one yet.

when you do then you will understand what I mean

[69billy]

(gizmo @ Nov. 12 2007,21:32) I voted for option 3, GG or LB, it alway's happens after
a few month's   I cant help it, I guess I'm a slut!  

I guess Thats makes me a biger slut...

[diablo80]

I voted Sure...etc

I would stay with someone who is special... As you already know I have done over the last year and so... but the question now is... I have been faithfull to her has she been faithful to me

Anyway, Ladyboys are always more predictable than normal women... this is an advantage I think

Diablo Le Grec