I WISH someone would invent...

[Bumpa STIKKA]

You know those strings that you pull on curtains to open or close them?

You have to guess which one is which, in a blind grope behind the materiel.

What's your average at getting it right first time? 50-50?  

Not me... I've been keeping a count and I reckon I get it right about 30% of the time...  

I wish someone would invent curtains which have the two bits of string that you have to choose from a different texture so I could get it right ALL THE TIME!

It's not a big thing to ask but you would think by now that this would be standard!

Grrrrr!

[Tomcat]

A condom made of a synthetic kevlar skin so that i can have a tactile fucking experience once again without the fear of the Grim Reaper getting involved.

[laputanegra]

I want the remote control on the movie Click, without the erase function though.

[SiamSam]

My Goodness, life is such a chore for so many.

[Tralala777]

Pcmn,chelation is for purging heavy metals from the body,not fatty cholesterol deposits lining the artery walls. I heard about it a couple of years ago,when I had five stents put in coronary arteries and was put on statin therapy,but found the muscle pain they caused too hard to bear.I read about in online,then wondered why all the professional cardiac groups hadn't mentioned it in their literature.....then started reading all the scam reports. Desperate people will try anything if their life is on the line....like paying hundreds of dollars for a bottle of stuff that doesnt work.

Promoting chelation as a cure for atherosclerosis is so wrong! Its a con,with the sole aim of making money for the marketers.

If it did work,Big Pharma would be all over it like a tramps coat,and cardiologists worldwide would be advocates. The fact that they dont signifies that the science doesnt support its claims. Statins make billions for the companies involved,but millions of users abandon them because of extreme side effects. A liquid to strip the build up from the artery walls would be the biggest medical product ever launched in terms of revenue. I paid $45,000 for the 5 stents.....but would pay way more for a product that cleared the plaque from being there in the first place.

[pacman]

I am sorry to hear of your problems Tralala. And I know that CT was developed for lead & other heavy metals. But it is also used today to target other health issues that conventional medicine can't touch. Blocked arteries is just one.

I didn't elaborate on my personal experience with CT but to comment on your post, I will. I had a "cardiac event" that requires me to take statins every day. I have been a patient of my GP ever since he gave up his place on the transplant team here, so he is not a naive dreamer selling snake oil to desperate people. After my event, I asked him if I would benefit from CT. I knew about it because it is located in his practice, a large purpose built place with some 8 doctors & many nurses & staff.

He said it wouldn't do any harm & it could be good preventative treatment before my pending overseas trip. There was no pressure to sell me into taking it. I had 4 sessions with a concoction of 'whatever' in a bag that was slowly dripped into my arm. I struck up conversations with my fellow patients & they offered some amazing stories of their illness & subsequent treatments that eventually led them to trying CT. And no one said it hadn't changed their life. The chap I mentioned was one of the few there for blocked arteries. And he swore by his experience with CT.

I took up his story with my GP. I said it was amazing, why isn't this more known? He told me how much criticism he had from the medical profession over his decision to start offering CT. He said he had become a victim of a fear campaign by drug companies who were giving alarmist stories to other doctors not to refer patients to him. He told me if I googled CT, there were many sites full of negative tales about CT. He could only conclude there was a conspiracy against CT by self-interest groups who feared the impact of anything that might deter bypass patients from undergoing very expensive operations.

That was when he told me the story about the specialist trained to chop off legs. I thought it was an apt analogy & replace "leg-chopper" with cardiologist & the story is the same. After spending a fortune to get through Med School, with a huge mortgage to pay, an expensive wife, kids school fees, overseas holidays, cars & golf club memberships, why on earth would any cardiologist support something as simple & cheap as CT?

I can't offer any suggestions to you personally Tralala, if you tried CT & it didn't work, I am sorry to hear it. But please don't call it a con. I think it is a valid alternative for SOME people, especially those who I spoke to personally who told me it did work. You wrote that Chelation Therapy's sole aim is to make money for the marketers - I believe you have your argument reversed, at $100+/- per treatment for CT versus $100,000+ for bypass surgery, just who has the most to lose here? And do not think for one second that Big Pharma isn't vitally interested in denying any positive claims for CT. If the word got out that there was an alternative, even one with no guarantee, they stand to lose millions.

Those scam reports you mention, could they be placed by vested interests? Happy patients reporting good results here have seen sceptical doctors sending more & more patients for CT. I can't say they are all cured but certainly some of them are.

[mission]

Naturally lubricating Ladyboys.

By the time I get a condom on and KY is appliied to the necessary areas I often have one of my erectile dysfunction events which really gives me the shits.

I'd like a more natural flow, or maybe I shouldn't spend so much time on foreplay.

[Tomcat]

ha ha

I used to rip the condom pack open for quick access but one sweety accused me of trying to wear a re furbished Durex , as if.

anwyay
I just thought... Thats it! , a Beer that doesnt give you the droop

[strocube]

I would like some clever person to invent weed that does not give you the munchies. For me, the one drawback about smoking weed is that I eat too damn much. This is not helping my mission to stay as lean as possible.

[strocube]

A pill that gets rid of man boobs, keeps you lean, grows hair to its original condition, and returns your libido to 20-year-old levels; in essence, the fountain of youth.

[SiamSam]

A computer program that with the click of a mouse instantly removes the horrid Japanese pixelation chap.

[pacman]

(strocube @ Mar. 19 2011,03:11) A pill that gets rid of man boobs, keeps you lean, grows hair to its original condition, and returns your libido to 20-year-old levels; in essence, the fountain of youth.

HGH - Human Growth Hormone. It will turn the clock back 20 years & addresses all your concerns except the hair. Increased testosterone is counter productive to hair growth.

Ask your doctor if he can prescribe it for you. Here in Oz it is perfectly OK if you meet certain criteria. And fully understand the side effects.  It will promote lean muscle mass & give you a horn that can break cement. And also raises the risk of stroke...    

[TEXASMAC]

By stoke do you mean or the heart?

[pacman]

Both.

[mission]

I'll take the risk and die happy.