Any other alcoholics on the board?

[surropan]

Just wondering, any other of us alkies here? I'm not talking about guys who drink a bit too much-- I mean real alcoholics, like me, who's entire existence has been dominated and likely destroyed by alcohol?

I was sober for 4+ years, now I'm back to a two-bottle-a-day (whiskey) man. It's really easy to fall back into the lifestyle here in LOS.

It's getting to that same point again, as before I got sober, where my life is really suffering from it.  I can't interact with respectable society, as I always reek of booze, even at 8 am. Again, that's kind of easy to do in los.  But if I had a job, I'd be fucked.

I've been in touch with the AA community here, but I always hated that shit.  I sobered up myself before, after realizing how absurd the whole AA culture (and it really is it's own culture) is.

It's officially gotten to the point where I, to use an American expression, have to "shit or get off the pot." I have to choose to kill myself with alcohol or turn it all around and do something with my life. I'm tired with the tortuously slow version of suicide I've chosen. Something's gonna change, or else I'm gonna have to check out in a much quicker and easier manner.

[Rocket J. Squirrel]

I drank heavily for a long time. It started out as a fun social thing but in time it didn't seem to work so well. I would say in my case, my problems connected to my drinking got progressively worse.

By the end, I felt quite like you describe.

In the back of my mind, I knew for years that it might be a good idea to "cut down a bit". I just never seemed to do it.

One day, I was complaining to someone about how fucked up my life was - my job sucked, my girlfriend was leaving me, everybody around me was an asshole, I had difficult parents, etc. etc. I figured that if I could get all of that stuff straightened out, then maybe I wouldn't drink so much. He suggested that maybe I had it backwards - that I should quit drinking and then my life might get better. I was feeling so shitty day-in and day-out that I figured "what the hell" I'll give it a try.

Quitting drinking was probably one of the best things that I have done for myself. Suicide or "checking out" is now the last thing on my mind. If its a choice between quitting drinking or killing ones self, I think putting down the booze is a better option.

So, now when I go out, it's soda for me. No big deal to me if the rest of you drink.

Hopefully I haven't scared too many BM's away as I'll be looking for people to hang out with when I get over there.

Rocky

[pacman]

Surropan, something has changed,

by reaching out to all of us you have taken a significant step in starting the process of change.

You said you sobered up before, sir, you are going to have to do it again.

I don't want to over simplify it, I know the hold alcohol can have,
but surropan, no-one here wants to see you dead.    

The forum can help you, post on this thread you started every time you are not coping, by asking for support, I'm sure you will get it.

We may not know you personally but I know I speak for many when I say we give a damn about your situation.

[Stogie]

Lightweight these days, but did enough in the past to cause the current state of dementia!

[jaymee]

Me too.

You can use my liver to start a campfire. I tend to cut down for aesthetique reasons especially if I'm trying to get more toned up. Alcohol makes one look flabbier.

I'm not sure how you guys are but my problem is that I find it hard to get drunk, so thats when the binge drinking sets in.

All in all, I think being fearful of dropping dead from a liver/heart ailment or for myself, looking out of shape, does help one quit better. You probably shouldn't hang out near folks who drink too much.

[Jaypee]

(pacman @ Nov. 04 2008,16:27) Surropan, something has changed,

by reaching out to all of us you have taken a significant step in starting the process of change.

You said you sobered up before, sir, you are going to have to do it again.

I don't want to over simplify it, I know the hold alcohol can have,
but surropan, no-one here wants to see you dead.

The forum can help you, post on this thread you started every time you are not coping, by asking for support, I'm sure you will get it.

We may not know you personally but I know I speak for many when I say we give a damn about your situation.

Excellant post Pacman, their are many of us on the board I am sure who are prepared to offer words of encouragement, sympathy (if needed) and advise to others who reach out for it.

[seanbeag7]

I used to drink heavy when i was younger but i found a turning point in my life 18 yrs ago, when the day i came home pissed after drinking back 2 bottles of vodka and some cider, i when into my home and my mum saw me and started nagging so i hit her hard across the face,

The results were that all my family refused to speak to me for nearly 6 months and i had to leave home the following morning and i learnt a very hard lesson.

I now go out maybe 1-2 nights a week nowadays and i will have maybe 2-3 pints of cider, i won't be drunk but just nicely merry. and i live with that happily in a way.

As for my mum, before she died last year of Cancer she never really forgive me for what i did and she never wanted to be left alone in a room with me, thats the hurt i carry with me every day, i hope some day i will meet my mum and we can finally put a end to the hurt that is carried between us.

I hope that you can find the help you need to slow down, thats all, forget the wankers that tell you to cut it out, i mean fuck it every one is different and drink, smoking and drugs effect every one differently, so it may be easy for one person to get of the booze completely, but it's not the same for everyone.

As pacman has said we are all here to help you, but at the end of the day it must be you alone that wants our help.

I do hope things get better for you, and if they do, maybe you will come back to this thread in a few years time and say, what the fuck was i thinking when i wrote this shite.

[azza33]

I try and stay off the turps as much as possible these days...

I used to hit it fairly hard but, quite frankly, i feel far better off the piss than on it!

[Looker]

I have "boozed" around a bit when I was 20-21 also because I used to live in a S.American country up the Andies with not much to do every evening. Then drinking competitions to go...some 5-10 minutes to insert the key in the door lock..and some vomit scattered on the pillow the morning after. NOT NICE

Suppropan..I don't need to re-add that you can find our support in here!

[strocube]

I've never been much of a heavy drinker. Thankfully I get buzzed on half a beer so I don't need to drink that much. Also, as I've gotten older, I'm now 49, I'll feel like absolute shite for two, sometimes three days if I over do it.
As someone mentioned here, another reason to go easy on the booze is 'cause it makes you fat. I also find that if I drink more than two or three drinks my Johnson  won't get hard, or if it does I can't cum.
There was a time a few years ago when I thought I was drinking too much. I'd get home from work and I'd have nothing to do. I'm single so it was just me and the four fucking walls, so I'd drink, get baked and eat way too much, every night.
This was not working for me for obvious reasons. I decided to back to school. Best thing I ever did. I got me out of the house and interacting with people, it was interesting and challenging. Right now I'm two semesters away from getting a master's a degree.
I'm not saying you should go back to school, but it is important that you be interested, engaged and challenged by something. I know it's sounds lame but it really is important to have projects and goals that you're working on.
From your post it sounds like you have nothing to do except drinking. Find something that you're interested in and pursue it, keep busy, find friends and people to hang out with whose main reason for socializing is not to get drunk.
I agree with you that AA is kind of lame and cult-like, it is not for everyone. I'm sure there are alternatives.
Best of luck.

[strocube]

Surropan, I forgot to add that if you're drinking two bottles of hard liquor per day, if you stop cold you could die. Alcohol withdrawal can kill you. I don't know the particulars of your situation and everyone is different, but you might need to detox with professional help so you don't die.

[allstar88]

i dont know if this will help you but a year ago i was stressed with work and not sleeping so i drank two bottles of wine every night to get to sleep . i then got some counseling and medication which helped short term,then i lost my job and could of gone back on the drink but i got a job looking after a man paralysed from the neck down which made me appreciate what i have in life (my health,family)i now also respect myself and others more.sharing with board members helped me(daveduke),get some professional help and get out and about more and keeping busy helps me,look at the broader picture in life.i hope this helps you? good luck pal.

[Guest]

Alcohol is the only recreational drug that I have ever taken and from time to time (yesterday being the most recent) I rather over do it    however, my work requires hours of concentration and communication with professional people, not to mention fairly large sums of money so I have learnt to leave it alone for at least five days a week while I'm in work mode.
Both my paternal grandfather & father battled with alcoholism and spending lengthy spells in Pattaya where every day I would witness characters like surropan living life on skid row has made me even more determined that this is one route that shall be avoided at all costs.

[jimslim]

I'm one of those annoying keep fit types nowdays , cycling to work , walking miles , swimming and playing indoor football twice a week .

I have the odd blow out but nowhere near the levels I used to do , and I feel fitter now in my late thirties than I did ten or fifteen years ago .

What you are drinking is extremely dangerous Surropan , I think you obviously realize that , so thats a good first step , but good luck with whatever you do , it won't be easy .

I normally sign off with a   , but given the circumstances you are getting a  

Good Luck  

[sev7en]

My dad drank him self to death, so i try not to go the same way.