It's your perfect FANTASY day, so...

[seamus]

(allstar88 @ May 03 2008,13:13)

(daveduke007 @ May 03 2008,20:00) My perfect two days will be hopefully seeing Manchester United lift the Premiership Trophy whilst I'm with my "teerak" in Samui next Sunday and then the European Cup in Phuket on the 21st    

looks like that one may come true dave?

OK when we came over to England we settled in east London, but why the fuck did Me Da let Me support West Ham. Whats this" luck of the irish" bull's shit. LOL



Seamus

[daveduke007]

(Otho @ May 03 2008,18:11) The European Cup Final is in Phuket?

Great idea!

No, but I will be

[PigDogg]

(PigDogg @ May 02 2008,00:08) For me it starts with morning sex and brief massage then a big cup of coffee. Will add the rest later.

It's going to be a great day, Giants are in the Super Bowl being played for the first time in Krungthai Bank Stadium here in Pattaya and I have a block of tickets for me and my mates.

Turn on the telly before I head out to the game and see Howie, Terry, and Stogie on the pregame show.
(to be continued)

[kahuna]

(PigDogg @ May 04 2008,02:40) Turn on the telly before I head out to the game and see Howie, Terry, and Stogie on the pregame show.

Stogie ain't gonna be a happy camper if the Saints ain't playing...

[pacman]

It's another beautiful day in Bangkok as my limo makes its way to Ladyboy Towers.

Naang Faa is putting on a lunch to celebrate my winning the Nobel Prize for Literature for my modest contributions to the LB Forums.

"What about your housemates," I asked her, "some were not happy when I left last time before servicing them all."

"All fine pacman, many of them are overseas & you will have all afternoon to pleasure the rest after lunch."

The call from the Nobel Prize commitee had come as a surprise, I was hoping it was to award me the big one - for years I had declared I would kill for the Nobel Peace Prize, but that would have to wait.

My driver interrupts my daydreaming "Call on line 2 Mr pacman, George Clooney wanting to know if he can play you in the movie based on Naang Faa's life."

"George, I have been expecting your call, I have had Brad & Tom ringing for the same thing, one's too ugly, the other's too short."

"I'll get back to you George, I'll have to run it past Naang, she's opted to play herself, none of the current lot of A-list actors are beautiful enough."

I have to hang up with George still pleading in my ear & return my mind back to lunch.
I wonder who should play Stogie, Sidney Greenstreet & Charles Laughton have both been dead a long time.
We will probably use a CGI of him - it isn't a horror story after all.
Other BMs will be used in cameo roles, subservant to the leads of course.

Arriving at the gilded palace aka Ladyboy Towers Naang greets me & asks me to hurry inside.

"What has you so excited?" I enquire.

"Manchester United are on TV receiving the greatest thrashing in the history of the Premier League"

"By Chelsea?" I ask.

"No, the Lower Bromwich Under 14's girls Hockey team"

Crikey I think to myself, they really have slipped a notch.

Stay tuned for the afternoons frivolities.

[newwriter]

(donnnnnny @ May 03 2008,17:52) i thought i knew you better newrtighter
ps ive got ozzie chomping at the bit wht about A TRIP TO TAXI YOU BASTARD

You didn't know I was interested in LB?

Taxi sounds good. Let's do it. Next weekend is free both days at the moment. PM me with preference.

[pacman]

My perfect fantasy day continues :

Naang & I finish lunch when without warning she announces : "Pacman, I want to get married,"

Not for the first time I feel cause to curse my rakish good looks.

Blushing I reply : "Naang this is ...."

"Not you pacman, there isn't the girl alive who could tame your brutish ways. No, there is someone else ...."

"Stogie !!" I gasp "you want to make an honest man out of our webmaster?"

"Pacman, you are such an idiot sometimes. Out at the Forum HQ where Stogie lives with TTChang, there is only one bedroom. You know what that means."

"Stogie sleeps on the couch?"

"No, they have both crossed the final frontier. They realised there was no point in fighting it any longer."

With my mind reeling I said the only logical thing I could think of "that will be good news for bigmick. There won't be pistols at dawn for the hand of Cindy."

Another shock : "There is no bigmick, in fact there are no Irish guys, well funny ones at least. Their parts are scripted by a Comedy writing team paid from a secret forum slush fund."

"But jimslim was just out here with his mate ciobha, are you saying they are figments of Stogie's warped mind?"

The look on Naang's face confirmed my worst fears.

"Wait a sec" I burst out "I met some of the Irish fellows, bumblebee, orgasmaddict ... are you saying they aren't funny?"

"I rest my case" replied Naang.

Undeterred I continue "Baklaboy is funny .... have you heard his impression of Kenneth Williams? Funny as fuck!"

Naang turns her eyes towards me "pacman, baklaboy IS Kenneth Williams. He said 'ohhhhhh maaaatron' once too often & she had him exiled to Thailand."

"I thought he looked a bit weary, he claimed it was too many late nights"

"So" I asked "who is this lucky guy, the one you will swear undying love & devotion to?"

"It isn't anyone you would expect, but thinking it over I have realised my heart belongs to Doug."

"DOUG !!!!!!" I gasp as I spray expensive wine all over the table. "Of course, the old reverse psychology trick."

"Yes pacman, I have been giving it much thought & as much as I started off hating him, the feelings of love & the desire to save his soul kept coming through. I want to make him my life's work, I want him here at LB Towers as Mr Faa."

"Then when he has found himself, I expect both of us will be able to devote our lives in saving the other lost souls who drop by the board. You know them, the stupid, the insane, the angry losers who spoil a good thread. I hope you will be happy for us."

What could I say except to wish Naang the best. As I sat at the table with my head spinning from all the revelations, I wondered what else the day could possibly offer.
My musings were interupted by a beautiful LB presumably wanting sex.

"Excuse me Mr Pacman. There is a gentleman at the door with a large paper bag for you. He says his name is Franck & he is returning a debt he owes you."

On a day of fantasies, isn't the prospect of good news from Franck the most possible of all my dreams?
Time will tell - time the great equaliser, given time all wrongs can be righted, all debts paid & all recriminations forgotten.

[bigmick22]

post of the month - somebody give this guy a t-shirt

[seamus]

Now that is a fecking fantasy, No Irish on this forum & were not funny, some people just have to take it that one step too far Next your be writing for the sun, on the problem page, I can see it now "Dear pacman, I went to Los & slept with wot I thought was a girl, I picked her up at a bar (Guess) There were no indications that these lovley creatures were not the real thing & I have to say I had far too much to drink, I only noticed when We woke the next morning.Does this mean I'm gay ?"
Over active imagination me thinks
There's always one

Seamus

[kahuna]

(bigmick22 @ May 11 2008,14:28) somebody give this guy a t-shirt

I was thinking more like a straitjacket...

[bigmick22]

are you sure Pacman wants you to use his real photo on the forum?

[pacman]

No worries Mick, that's an old photo & since my release I am looking much better.

Dropped a few kilos too.

I've still got it !!!

[pacman]

(seamus @ May 11 2008,14:37)  Now that is a fecking fantasy, No Irish on this forum & were not funny, some people just have to take it that one step too far    Next your be writing for the sun, on the problem page, I can see it now "Dear pacman, I went to Los & slept with wot I thought was a girl, I picked her up at a bar (Guess) There were no indications that these lovley creatures were not the real thing & I have to say I had far too much to drink, I only noticed when We woke the next morning.Does this mean I'm gay ?"
Over active imagination me thinks    
There's always one  

Seamus

Now seamus, where would this forum be without our over-active imaginations?

And where did I say there were no Irish on the forum?
I do wonder how we finished up with some funny cunts amongst them, I mean statistically what are the odds?

If we weren't blessed by the ravings of Mick, Jim & others, then realistically Stogie would have to invent them.

But of course you were being sarcastic & were not to be taken seriously.
You are vey welcome to join in winding me up, I love a satirical post, now you just have to try harder with the humour ......  

And as for being gay, give us a kiss & I will tell you ......  

[seamus]

   Top man !
& I agree with Bigmick, pacman for the "T" shirt

[allstar88]

united to blow the league and euro cup