Lawyer & witness converse like farang & ladyboy

[thaibound]

For some reason these made me think of earlier thread translating ladyboy-thai into English. You know, like "I love you forever" means "You look rich and I won't leave until you're not."

Enjoy.


> >These are from a book called Disorder in the
> Courts, and are things people actually said in
> court, word for word, taken down and now published
> by court reporters who had the torment of staying
> calm while these exchanges were actually taking
> place. Have a laugh!!
> >-----------------------------------------
> >ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
> >WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
> >
> >
> >ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of
> the impact?
> >WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
> >
> >
> >ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband
> said to you that
> >morning?
> >WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
> >ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
> >WITNESS: My name is Susan.
> >_
> >
> >ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a
> person dies in his
> >sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next
> morning?
> >WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
> >
> >
> >ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old,
> how old is he?
> >WITNESS: Uh, he's twenty-one.
> >
> >
> >ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was
> taken?
> >WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?
> >_
> >
> >ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
> >WITNESS: By death.
> >ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
> >_
> >
> >ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning
> pursuant to a
> >deposition notice which I sent to your Attorney?
> >WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
> >_
> >
> >ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What
> school did you
> >go to?
> >WITNESS: Oral.
> >_
> >
> >ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
> >WITNESS: Huh?
> >___
> >
> >ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy,
> did you check
> >for a pulse?
> >WITNESS: No.
> >ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
> >WITNESS: No
> >ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
> >WITNESS: No.
> >ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient
> was alive when
> >you began the autopsy?
> >WITNESS: No.
> >ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
> >WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk
> in a jar
> >ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been
> alive,
> >nevertheless?
> >WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have
> been alive and
> >practicing law.
> >

[post-op lover]

So which one is the ladyboy? The lawyer? Damn, even though she is brainless, she still sounds like a well-educated postie. Send her over to my place.

[Guest]

I can't figure out whos dumber the witnesses or the lawyers.

[allstar88]

i am bored Daz.