Shit-house humour.

[Guest]

Hi,

If you, like me, spent countless hours sitting in the public WCs, sans trousers round ankles, crapping and reading the poems scribbled on the walls, then this is for you.

Here are a pair of the more memorable ones.

"It's no use standing on the seat,
the crabs in here can jump six feet."

Who will ever forget the next one?

"Here I sit broken hearted,
paid a penny, only farted."

Can you remember any others?

I have this image of you guys rushing from crapper to crapper, with notebook and pen, copying down all that you see. Watch out for the men in the long trench coats.
Spedius

[BAM]

"Here I sit broken hearted,
came to shit, and only farted."

"Hickory, Dickory, Doc
This Chick was sucking my cock
The clock struck two, I dumped my goo
and then her too on the next block"

[Guest]

Hi Bam,

Two different versions of the same shit-house poem, two generation's variations perhaps, interesting?

I do like your avatar, who is she, do you have any more pictures of her?

I've run out of poems, do you know of any others?
Spedius

[katoeylover]

Spedius,

That is the famous, glorious Noon, to be found each night in Cascades (if you are early enough!!)

[Guest]

(katoeylover @ Jun. 19 2006,16:34) Spedius,
That is the famous, glorious Noon, to be found each night in Cascades (if you are early enough!!)

Hi katoeylover,
Thanx mate, so that's Noon, wow

Here's yet another, fuller version.

Here I sit,
broken hearted,
Came to shit
but only farted.
Deep in grief,
I ponder my dilemma-
sit and stink
or take an enema!

Spedius

[BAM]

(spedius @ Jun. 19 2006,16:24) I do like your avatar, who is she, do you have any more pictures of her?

That's Miss Noon!

http://asiantsgirls.com/cgi-bin....cascade

http://asiantsgirls.com/cgi-bin....cascade

[Guest]

Hi all,

Whilst surfin' the net, seeking out new examples for inclusion in this thread, I stumbled across this item.

The poem below is a far better opener for this thread than my own humble efforts.

"Toilet Stall Poetry

By Allen Coyle

Have you used a public restroom
Have you been seated inside a stall
And have you noticed the words of wisdom
That are scrawled across the wall

Curses and verses and wisecracks
Hints and tips not taught in school
Insightful quotes by scholars
Sketches of women in the nude

If you must answer the call of nature
There€™s no better way to spend your time
Than to perch yourself upon a toilet
And to read these clever lines

As you€™re taking care of business
You admire this masterpiece
And wonder how many have added to it
As they sat here on this seat

All of the many virtuosos
Who contributed to this monument
Are the ones responsible for its beauty
And for all the graffiti written on it

You think about your unheard voice
Just before you flush
And how those who have nothing to say
Are the ones who say too much

But in the restroom things are different
Where a wise man can say his piece
In only one or two prophetic verses
Advice that€™s always free

So you clutch your trusty pen
And find an empty space
To write what€™s on your mind
In your very own sacred place

And so with one conclusive scribble
You admire what you€™ve composed
It fits in so nicely with this mural
Made up of drawings, poems, and prose

You flush with satisfaction
You€™ve become a bathroom poet
You€™ve had the ability to create beauty
And yet you didn€™t even know it

And so every poem and quote
And even the sketches that are obscene
Will remain as art for many centuries
Or until the janitor wipes them clean"
Spedius

[Guest]

(Bam @ Jun. 19 2006,17:09)

(spedius @ Jun. 19 2006,16:24) I do like your avatar, who is she, do you have any more pictures of her?

That's Miss Noon!
http://asiantsgirls.com/cgi-bin....cascade
http://asiantsgirls.com/cgi-bin....cascade

Hi Bam,
Thanx for the links, she really is quite dishy

Yet another variation on the 'Here I sit' poem.

here I sit all broken hearted
tried to shit but only farted
then one day I took a chance
tried to fart and shit my pants

Do you have any more poems or jokes?
Spedius