How do you do it?

[Guest]

(rxpharm @ Jun. 15 2007,03:07) Option 1, but then there are no lbs where I am right now.

My situation too, although I have no problem with going out with friends who are non-LB TG.
I've come a long way to this stage(having been somewhat brainwashed by society's expectations).

Ronin

[SamplerDoc]

 Pretty Good Poll There......
I Said and Think.....
Who Cares, I mean, Afterall I am Marrying My Phil LB     

[rxpharm]

(grunyen @ Jun. 16 2007,03:48) RR, I know "back in the village" it is probably a mixed feeling about acceptance of what has become of mom and dad's son/daughter. And I'm sure some are much more accepting and some are less so.

When you actually show up back home with a guy though, that really makes mom and dad realize the situation at hand. How does your ladies family feel to have a (presumably) white foreigner coming home with their transitioned daughter?

I have to assume they can at least be polite since you make it sound like you do this regularly, and maybe they are completely OK with it. I would imagine that would be like the final straw that really freaks a lot of parents out. I feel fairly safe in saying most people are a little xenophobic. I imagine like a white boy in the South (of the US, like Dukes of Hazzard country) telling his parents he's gay, then telling them he wants to become a woman, then bringing home a big black man visiting from Africa.

That's got to be a bit of a shock. Of course Southerner's in the US aren't usually buddhist and haven't had a long time where a significant portion of the population crosses gender publicly.

I'd be curious to know your experiences and thoughts on this.

Hi Grunyen, I have actually visited the families of two lb gfs, one time in Udon Thani and another time in Roi Et - both are in the Isaan region (NE) of Thailand.

In my case it was not too difficult as I am of Asian heritage and I felt welcomed by both families when I visited. There are certain things you need to keep in mind as Thai tradition is going to be very different, and your gf should be coaching you on this.

Now, this is assuming you actually want to try and establish a long term relationship with an lb. Visiting the family is not recommended unless you are serious about her - and of course if she is coming from the P4P scene, you must be very careful about everything. If she doesn't come from the P4P scene, of course the situation is different.

I would say that from some of the accounts related by a few of the posters, that the family acceptance seems good. Of course it would be better if you could speak some Thai as well.

Yes, you are right, Thai culture is very different from western and the situation you described about good ole southern US is not likely to happen in rural Thailand.

I think you really just need to get over and experience it when you have the chance.

[buttafly]

I voted for number 2, but then again there are none where I live so it's a moot point

when in Thailand I don't give a good fuck who sees me with an LB but even there I travel to places now that don't have any ladyboys at all; can't be any more discreet than that!

[stogie bear]

Good Thai Girls will not be seen walking hand in hand with you...

Thailand has come a long way since then! Holding hands is very normal. Go to any mall, school or hop on a bus and you'll see couples holding hands everywhere.

[buttafly]

very normal for hookers also, either ladyboys or ladies

how many 50-60 year old men have you seen doing that with their tee-lac who is 30 years younger? and of course the girl would be holding their hand if there was zero baht involved, right???

I haven't held anyone's hand since my lil' girl got out of 1st grade......adults can find places perfectly fine without my help

[Road Runner]

On the holding hands in public. Yes it is accepted in the larger cities where there is more western influence and generally a younger population.

It is still unusual out in Issan where you will only see teenagers doing it and I bet mostly when their parents are not around

I don't remember seeing any Thai/Thai couples over about 30 doing it.

RR.

[Road Runner]

Hello Grunyen,

I only have experience of meeting Herself's family and she is the only one who speaks English.
Obviously I can really only give my take on what I see and what Herself has told me.


Her family realised that she was a ladyboy from when she was very young  -  maybe 5-6 years old.  From talking to other girls this is mostly the case.
Thais as Budhists are very accepting of most things and the families are usually very close and supportive.  It's not all sweetness and light though!
Herself was brought up by her grandparents.  I know her grandfather found it a real problem but her grandmother - and I think two of her aunts - supported her.


There is still a rift between Herself and her grandfather but he does talk to her and even calls her his daughter now.
From what she has said a good part of that acceptance has come from taking me to see her family and the length of time we have been together.
I think what also helps is that I get on well with her grandfather  -  even to the point of making jokes about her in sign language  


The culture difference does not seem to be any problem either.  I still remember the first night we went to her family farm.
They did their best to welcome me and only seemed worried that they could not speak to me in English to find out about me.


RR.

[dummy_plug]

I voted option 1, but I have to admit, if I'm surrounded by farang tourist then I become very uncomfortable. The first being, I'm sure more than a few can detect a bar girl quite easily and the second being that some may be so keen to notice its a ladyboy. I guess you could say fuck it, but thats just me. Back home, I don't think I'd be caught dead with a TS/ladyboy and I live in one of the more liberal parts of my country!

On a side note about Grunyen's question about getting harassed. I've seen Thais just stare at me and my companion on end, even while they are aware I am staring directly back at them. I'm sure more than once I've gotten some bad comments thrown my way (see my trip report) by Thais. And this didn't happen to me, but I've seen some drunk farang tourists around Nana yelling stupid shit to the Lbs as they walked passed. I've seen this a few times actually. I never stuck around long enough to see how it ended, but I imagine if you/she just ignores it and walks away then problem solved. I don't think its inconceivable that this wouldn't occur elsewhere as drunk people tend to throw all cuation and judgement to the wind.

[PigDogg]

(grunyen @ Jun. 15 2007,12:48) How does your ladies family feel to have a (presumably) white foreigner coming home with their transitioned daughter?

What was really great was no one spoke any English so i didn't have to make small talk and could just smile and daydream.

They probably think it's in their interest for her to be with an older farang with money than a young poor Thai guy.

She says Mama likes me. But maybe it was the 5000 baht I gave to teerak to give to Mama.

[Guest]

People are people, and so you will have all flavors of reactions, just like I had all flavors of reactions when I walked with my Filipina wife (with dark skin) in Canada. Likewise for the families here with you visiting them.

I offered to put in air con and a TV in May's parents place. They said no. Don't want it. We even had to nearly force them to put in a telephone so that May could call them, and even then they said they didn't want to make any calls, so we got this 'receive call' only setup. My investment in that family to date is about 100 baht per month for this one-way telephone. They don't want a dime from me, and truth is, they could use it. They keep asking when I will come back as they want to see me. They only comment I heard that they really appreciated me doing was getting more weight on May. 'Good, good, more healthy now, thank-you'.

That being said, of course there will be those looking for the ATM machine. But is there any difference with GGs and their families? How many parents judget the boyfriends of girls by their jobs and wealth?

Anyhow, back to topic...I never have hidden anything with May or anyone else, anywhere, except for when my co-workers are around, and then, regrettably, there is no possibility of them knowing my orientation.

[jimslim]

One thing ladyboys aint is shy , so once you take the plunge be prepared for a few funny looks and comments
I voted the second option (which is easy for me caus Ive never seen one in my home town )

Like many here I started out in the shortime rooms or sneeking one into my room late at night , but once you get beyond that initial shyness and take them out like you would any GG its definately well worth it

I remember playing pool with a LB in Pattaya , she had the smallest tartan mini I had even seen in my life , so you could imagine every time it was her shot we got a full moon party
Anyway two guys were watching us from the bar , you could just sense they were having one of those "Is she or Isnt she " conversations , well next time it was her shot I gave her a big kiss on her nicely exposed cheek
You wanna seen their faces , they didnt know where to look

[moe666]

Kiss on her rosey cheeks way to go.