thai girfriends and money pit

[Guest]

hey guys i read some of the new posts and thought i would my take on getting involved with a thai girl or LB and falling into the money trap..

these girls are experts at making you fell special.. probably the main reason i like thailand is when you go with a bar girl (LB) these girls can make you feel so important.. they can make you feel as though you can walk on water.. it is unlike anyplace i have ever gone.. in a sense when you are in thailand you don't pay for just a piece of ass , you actually are paying for a girl friend, these girls will allow you get as close as you desire..

and guys these little ladyboys and girls can cry a river of tears.. they can make you feel so guilty about not taking care of them.. i know because i have been there... you almost feel so bad that you want to send money to take of your girl... it a natural emotional response..

now for my story.. as you know i have a girl at the OBs.. my last trip in may, she stayed with me for entire week.. never did she ask for money and at the airport the day i was leaving there she crying her heart out about me leaving.. was she sincere?? sure looked that way to me.. well anyhow i gave all the thai money i had ( 7500baht).. when i got back to the states i starting think about her situation over there.. if any of you guys have been to a girls apartment in bkk, you know how austere of life they live.. well. after being home for a about a week i thought that i would surprise my girl and i wired her 5000 baht... BIG MISTAKE GUYS.. within a week or two of getting my money all of a sudden here came the stories of how she needed more money.. her father had cancer, she got robbed one night, her roomate left town with the rent money.. you name it she tried it..

i puit my foot down and told her in no uncertain terms that i would not send anymore money.. that was it.. i also told her to find a fich farang at the OBs that would take care of her because i refuse to do so.. and that was that.. she hasn't ask me for money in over four months now...

so guys here is my take... in my example my girl viewed my act of kindness as a weakness.. she played me for all it was worth.. if you get involved with a girl or Lb over there in the LOS.. sure take care of them.. but make sure you take of them when you are in thailand.. never never get into the money trap.. you start sending money over there and it will never end.. it does become a money pit.. and believe me guys once the girl understands the generosity stops when you board your plane to come home, she will eventually respect you for being that way... rod

[Guest]

good post Rod; I personally feel that the girls who recieve a LOT of cash from some guy do not respect that guy at all, and are just playing him for a fool. They ask the guy, tell him some sob story, and the guy sends his dough; the girl and her friends are laughing all the way to the ATM machine. The girl who never asks for cash and doesn't expect it respects the guys a lot more, believe me. If that guy wants to send 5000 or 10,000 every few months or so, than so be it; it is from his heart as a gift and the girl usually accepts it as such and doesn't ask for more. when she does ask for more, than it's time to use the old Nancy Reagan line and Just Say No.

I have a good theory on all of this which i have always used since i first started going to Thailand in 1997; I have to work for a living, and no one is giving me a dime, so why should i give any to someone else unless they are doing something for me? I was first asked for money from a real girl after i returned from my first trip in that winter of '97; I wasn't into ladyboys then. It struck me as very odd that someone i hardly knew would ask me for cash, and my first instinct was "why should I?", and that has been my attitude ever since. The day that someone starts sending me 500 bucks a month for doing nothing is the day i will start sending money to other people, but i don't see that happening.

I told you guys about a month ago about my deal with Aon. She is the girl that i like the best and i guess you could call her my 'girlfriend'; I like her and she likes me. We spend a good amount of time together and when i am there I pretty much support her, which is fine; she is earning her pay by being my companion and helping me with things and giving me sex whenever we want to do that. When I left there in late May I sat her down and we had a chat; I told her in no uncertain terms that i would not be sending money while I was away. It's just something i don't do for anyone, despite the fact I really like her. She understood and probably respected that; she knows that i know a lot of people over there and my explanation that I would lose face by doing that was also another plausible excuse. It's not that I am a cheap charlie; I probably pay these girls as well as anyone when i am with them. It's just that i don't send money to people for doing nothing, no matter who they are. May has an ATM card from me; she works for me there and she pays the emplyoyees of the site with it, and she gets paid herself; she is WORKING, so she gets the cake, simple. Aon, as much as I like her, has no role for the site and therefore I can't pay her, simple.

Now, because she has never asked me for a cent since May, I have helped her out a bit; 5000 in July and 6000 in August, which she really appreciated but never asked for. and, she has not asked me for any since. Not enough to break my bank, but enough to help with her rent and help her out a little.

Rod, your point about the girls' living conditions is very true. But we all have it hard sometimes and have to pull ourselves up by the bootstraps without any help from anyone. When i was going through my bankruptcy and divorce and all sorts of other financial problems a few years back, i didn't see anyone opening up their purse strings for me.

May sound cold but that's life. Want money? get a job.

Jon

[Guest]

The old story,
We can go on and on about this..to great length's. Alot of this can be found in the old forum post's and it's good reading. I was in the same boat, SHIT im still in the same boat ! This I do know :
NEVER GIVE YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS BEFORE YOU LEAVE.
You will be back, that's all they need to know. Your doing a good thing but they will suck you dry if you let them, And I dont mean that in a good way.

Jeff

[Guest]

the e-mail  thing is a whole other topic to get me started on, Jeff, and again i will come across  as the bad  guy here when in reality I am just  trying to be a realist for the guys who only spend 3 or 4 weeks a year in the LOS.

  As I have stated many times, there is really no reason  to be e-mailing with the models  that you like, or in Rods case, with the ladyboys you have met on previous trips.  If people lived there half the year, that is one thing, but the guys that are waiting all year to spend 3 weeks in thailand  are   building up expectations on both sides that can not be lived up to.  The guys that write me for e-mail addresses  or take the models names off the Clubhouse  even though they are still 4 or 5 months away from their trip are asking for trouble, plain and simple. they write to 4 or 5 girls [or more], and by the time they get there and  meet the  girl or girls the expectations they have built up can rarely be lived up to.  The girls are inevitably a  let-down or  they don't  even get the call because the guy in question has met someone else. This has happened many times.

In Rods case and hundreds of others like that,   you meet a girl and like her very much; nothing wrong with that at all.  But as he said, many of these girls will try and sink the hook in you and come up with some sob story to get cash out of you, and then there are bad feelings on both sides when you  say NO.  This also happens often;  the guy will get back to his  country and the girl who captured his heart for 2 weeks in LOS [we have all been there]  is writing him and saying "i lub you too much" and he is  loving the  letters, and then after a few she will hit him with the inevitable plea for cash. Some guys fork it over;  some  guys say no and feel betrayed, and then the girl is pissed as well.

  Jeff makes a good, blunt point;  why give up the e-mail address if you are not going back for 5 or 6 months? the old cliche  about  " you don't lose your girl, you  just lose your turn" is  so true here.  After we leave that place there are dozens of other guys that take our places, and the girls are saying the same  shit to them that they were saying to us while we were there. Again,  sometimes  the harsh truth hurts, but it is true nonetheless.

 for the 100th time; the  best plan for a short stay in LOS is no plan.  Meeting girls on face-pic or through here is just a  waste of time, in my opinion;  some of those face-pic ads have thousands of views.....don't you think whatever the girl of your dreams is saying to you she is also saying to dozens of others?  I don't even visit that site because I  know it's pointless and I have over 100 e-mail addresses of  girls right here in my  PC that i don't even have the time to write with now as it is.  Rod is a great guy and  i like him a lot, but even he will admit that he is kind of stuck with this girl from Obs now because he has stayed in touch with her and she can't wait to see him again;  he even has to contemplate getting 2 hotel rooms and avoiding the best bar in BKK because of his relationship with her and that's not cool.

   Best plan for a 2 or 3 -week stay;  don't write anyone.  go there armed with fone numbers if you must {I am always happy to hand over as many as you guys want, If I have them}, and call the girls that you think look the best and would be the most fun.  But as Tonio  wrote in another post, sometimes even the hottest-looking girls can be a let-down.  There is no better  way to meet a girl than walking into Obs or Casa,  and flirting with the ones you like best; when the cutest one  is kissing your ear lobes and making your pecker rise and she is telling you how she will do all the wild things  you could possibly dream of, THAT is the girl you want to take home.

 and don't get her e-mail address

 Jon

[Guest]

hey jon.. point well taken.. i am one of those guys that go to the LOS 2-3 tmes a year, usually for a week or two at a time.. as for the e-mail thing, i just don't know if it is wise to write to stay in touch or just forget about the girl and wait for the next trip..

in my case with the OBs girl, i alllowed myself to get too close... but you know jon it is easy to get emotional invlved with a pretty little LB that constantly tells you how much she loves you..she also sends me pictures of her at work with some of her friends, which makes me feel closer to thailand.. it is selfish on my part to allow her to continue?? probably it was.. all i know is that as my trip gets closer in november i don't want to spend all my time with one LB.. so now i feel as though i made a big mistake letting this relationship spiral out of control... sure it was fun getting all the pics and nice letters and she even web cammed me a few times from the internet cafe at nana.. but i don't love the girl and i never should have put myself in such a tight spot... and Jon you are dead on when you say this has ruined my trips to my favorite LB bar in bbk.. if i go in the OBs a take a different girl all hell will break loose.. espcially if i barfine a girl like Aob(cherry), because they hate each other..

so i guess after much thought i really have decided on a new approach... like i said in my last post when i board the plane to come home i will try leave my feelings for a particular girl back in thailand where it belongs..and my wallet stays shut until my next trip..

going to thailand is a live and learn process.. i am relaitive newbie, having been in thailand 7 times the last four years.. but as i said before, the gilrs (LBs) in the LOS, are so emotional and they really do allow you to get close as you want... it is so different from any other country i have been to.. when they like you, they make having sex feel like a honeymoon night.. when they cry that river of tears it seems so gut wrenching real.. when they tell you how much they love you it hard to turn a deaf ear to it..

the best way to keep things in check is leave thailand in thailand, don't bring it home.. maybe some day when i live over there six months out of the year it will change but for right now i feel i made i big mistake.. and guys i am paying for it now.. i am for a big mess when i go over there because i refused to leave thailand in thailand.. my selfish desire of wanting to feel good and staying close to the girl and even encouraging her is going to bite me in the foot... but i will deal with her a kind way and in the end it will all be good i hope ..

so guys take heed to Jon's advice... unless you are on your way to thailand, please don't start e-mailing those pretty LBs over there.. you make think it is fun to have a little LB writing you all the time, but believe me when i say it just isn't worth it.. there will come a time when the fun stops and the emotional turmoil starts... take it from me guys and as i write this post i feel pretty rotten about what i have allowed to go on btween me and a precious little LB.. i should have known better... she deserves better... rod

[Guest]

hey Rod...nice reply....just to let you know, the name that Cherry puts on her model release form for us is Cherry, not Aob, and we have worked with her 3 times now. She may use the name Aob elsewhere but here she is Cherry.

you can have her for an afternoon meet sometimes when you are in LOS and your other sweetheart will never even know; Cherry is very discreet and will keep her mouth shut [I know this from the time I went in to Obs to take Chompoo and she was gone so I took Cherry home, and she never told Chompoo about it; she can keep a secret unlike many of these girls]. anyway, I have her number if you want it.

By the way.....she has a new rack now...no more small boy chest

Jon

[Guest]

I have to agree with Rod and Jon.

leave it behind when you get on the plane home. I mentioned in other posts about how foolish I was to send money over to someone and I mentioned about bumping into my LB friend outside Nana last time I was there. On that occasion it very nearly went pear shaped as she didnt know I was in country! I had gone 6000 miles and was there to have a good time! As Rod knows its so damn hard trying to tell  a Lb that when she is attached to you.
Im going back in November and im kinda tied down to meeting all these GG's and Lb's I made the mistake of keeping in touch with, they all know im coming and they all have my phone number. I know one day its all gonna end in tears! in BKK im like a kid in a sweet shop and I wanna try every different flavour! Last November my LB friend turned up at my hotel. I tell u I fuckin crapped it as I had a mate holidayin with me and I prayed she was convincing enough, lucky he couldnt tell his arse from his elbow and as far as my mates know I am str8 as a die. So far ive been LOS 5 times and I have only really learnt this. 1. Go there alone. 2. Leave there 'alone'

Steve

[Guest]

What dates are you there in November Rod? am gonna be around 2/11 - 15/11 celebrating my 30th !! anyone wanna buy me a cold one?

well you cant blame me for trying!

Steve.

[Guest]

he steve.. great post and i appreciate that you have gone through the same type of situation.. its not that i don't want to see the girl, i do.. but i want to butterfly too... so i will what happens.. it is just so fucking easy to get close to a girl over there... like i said before 'those little Lbs can make you feel like you can walk on water'.. easy to invloved with hard to get out of it

i 'll be in bbk from the 5th to 13th of november.. then to pattaya for a week for some peace and quiet..yeah right!!!. fininshing my holiday back in bbk until the 25th... so i be there and lets hook up some night.. i think Jon will annouce a LB meet date in the up-coming weeks... the more guys that show up the better.. we will stampeed into the OBs and cassanova together and give those pretty ladyboys a good work out that night... rod

ps.. jon if you read this post, you're damned right i want cherrys no#... i met her one night in the obs and she actualy slithered over next to me.... she radiates such a powerful sexuality... i will do lunch with cherry anytime...

[Guest]

OK, we will have a meeting to be determined later between us guys here and the guys that we know elsewhere around the web; it seems like at least you and me and Steve and Paul will be there, and anyone else who is in BKK is certainly welcome. Looks like somewhere around November 2-10, and we can all meet up at Big Dogs or somewhere similar. Maybe we can even hijack Stogie for the night, and Snick and all of those lucky long-termers who stay in LOS most of the time.

Date to be announced soon; anyone in BKK in early November sign up here! Write to me and I will send you small cherry's info, Rod; i don't want to get into the habit of giving out fone numbers and e-mails on this message board.

regards Jon

[Guest]

It is amazing to see so many guys getting hooked by GG's and LB's while in LOS and start sending money, gifts whatever. My philosophy for what it is worth in LOS is to have fun, be polite and courteous to the "girls" and make them laugh. If you can do this they will walk on hot coals for you!

Get on the plane and go home at the end of your holiday, you will have PLSD (Post LOS Stress Disorder) for sure but you get over that!

All this tears and shit at the airport is just a come on for cash, you have to realise that YOU are the Walking ATM to them and that is all.

This, however is not always the case, I have a GTG Good Thai Girl) girl friend, who is not a bar girl and I see her when I get to LOS but I always have time to myself when I don't tell her I'm in BKK!!! A guy has got to have some fun ! She has never ever asked or even hinted at wanting me to give her money and she is a joy to be with.

A few words of wisdom from a veteran traveller ! Go to LOS, have a ball and be nice to the "girls", you life will be changed for ever!

You hansum man!
You most hansum man ever come bangkok!
You most hansum man ever come Thailand!
You buy me lady drink and pay bar, me lub you long time, hansum man.

Special offer today only! You buy pussy - get ass free!

[Guest]

Well said Jon,
Sometime's I do not have the time to write long winded reply's. Sorry if I come across as " blunt " at time's But time is short for me now and I would like to help when I can. Alot of the older member's know how I feel for the ladies. For those that dont I say " give until it hurt's " They are beautiful creature's that make US feel so special. Are willing to have sex with us, for " peanut's " When there are fat, nasty,white women right next door that wouldnt give us the time of day ! So if they have to embelish the truth at time's and ask for extra money at time's and you feel for the girl it's good to give if you can. However when you leave the LOS and do not plan on returning for 6 month's / a year, the only way that they can contact you is by email. Then you WILL have a problem. ....They not only will see to to the airport but will be waiting for you there when you arrive the next time !!

Jeff

[Pinga]

I´ll be there in November also...sign me up. (6 - 13), then to Pattaya.

[Guest]

great....maybe we should make it friday the 7th......that was Rods original date with some other guys we know on the web.....lets see how many guys are free that night and can meet up at Big Dogs at around 7 or 8 PM. I know myself and Rod and a few others are on board already; should be fun!

Jon