When she falls in love with him

[sev7en]

(kahuna @ Aug. 18 2009,16:00) I suspect "love" to Thais means something much different than it does in the west...

Yes. It means money. Support. Take care etc etc.

[bigmick22]

as it did in the west until between 50 and 100 years ago.

Marriage for love etc is a relatively new thing. My grandparents had an arranged marriage - I guess my grandfather was judged to be a good provider by my grandmother's folks

They're just a bit behind us - stuck in semi-feudal serfdom (god knows if they'll ever get out of it - it just doesn't suit the rich elite to emancipate the average Issan farm laborer)

So - who likes boobies?

[jimslim]

(statuesque @ Aug. 18 2009,05:41) Has it happened that the escort/bargirl fell in love, genuinely that is, with the client?  

I'm sure its happened lots of times but it usually ends in tears .

Any ladyboy I've talked about this with in any detail has normally fallen for a customer or Thai man early in her career only to end up hurt .

Most ladyboys learn that lesson early on that they are wanted only as some guys sexual fantasy and can rarely experience real love , thats why they all believe in karma and payback so much , they believe a life on their own is their destiny .

It is nice to hear success stories but they are rare , I'd say Kahuna pretty much hit the nail on the head , the East v West concept of love is a bigger stumbling block than the fact they are transgendered .

The Thai view of "taking care " and all that comes with it is alien to most of us and makes us suspicious , because we have money they do not .

[Guest]

its quite funny that im reading these, my girl said only sunday, when we go her home xmas, mother want us marry ! she say if i want go uk have to marry at home xmas, and the price to give mother 200,000 baht
looks like mother been on the whiskey i said.

steviep

[seamus]

(parada @ Aug. 18 2009,15:57) looks like mother been on the whiskey i said.

Funny as fook, but good to see mothers drinking irish Whiskey

[Guest]

thai whiskey

[seamus]

Ah I see , just spell it properly

[Dieter]

So long she fall in Love...ok..
When you fall in Love .... Mekhong or shot you... 375 Mag will be fine...

A 22 are shit... ask Mirimark

Dieter

[f0xxee]

(statuesque @ Aug. 18 2009,17:56) Very interesting points, foxxee!
Try Yellow Fanta with sunshine next time and compare the results.  

Finely illustrated seanbeag7. Culture gaps can both be a boom and bane in every relationship. I should know, Im working on mine!  

S

Thanks for the feedback!

Today I shall try Green Fanta and sunshine and work my way up to the yellow. it's a slow decent into hell having a Fanta Jones....

Yesterday I said that keeping your love affair off the internet was important. This morning I read where Marla is back in SIN and another BM was (innocently I presume) asking her to join him for a drink. This naturally got a comment from Zack, who no doubt felt somewhat uncomfortable with what he saw as a public play for his girl.

Regarding your comments re: cultural differnces. I am interested to hear your views as a Filipina Statuesque. My last LTR was with a Cebuano (and anyone who has read my bitching would know that was far from a match made in heaven.)

Below is what I have noticed to be the most obvious difference beween Westerners and thais: our differing view on family.

I think it is fair to say that while falangs leave the nest and sever to a large extent the ties that bind us to our mothers, Thais do not. Sure we love our mothers but we do not put them in first place ahead of all contenders for the rest of our lives. Thais do. It is a culture where the matriach holds the purse strings, and there is a debt owed to the mother that cannot be repaid. The debt is for delivering them into their current incarnation.
When a young man joins a monestry, be it for week or a year, the good karma accrued is for his mother, not for him. Watching reruns of the Contender (Asia) last week I noted that these two Thai hard bastard Muay Thai champs were both fighting to buy thier mothers better houses. And if you called them mummies boys they would agree with you.
SO: if you do fall in love with a Thai ladyboy (or thai postie or GG) you need to understand the following order of lifelong Priorities as seen by a Thai:

1. Mother
2. Younger Siblings
3. Older Siblings
4. Father
5. You.

And this creates cross cultural chasm that can create problems. It's where her allowance goes. It's why she doesn't have any money of her own, its gone to Mum. And for her it is perfectly, understandably as it should be.

Does it mean she doesn't love you? Not at all! She loves you in the order that is culturally right for her. And she would love a thai man in the same way, so don't get pissed at it. And same same she would expect a wedding price for her parents. (although 200,000B seems steep.)

My experience with Filipinas is that that they have a more traditional catholic family POV. The mother is the power behind the throne, assuming they are still married.

Your thoughts?

[donnnnnny]

(bigmick22 @ Aug. 18 2009,20:56) as it did in the west until between 50 and 100 years ago.

Marriage for love etc is a relatively new thing. My grandparents had an arranged marriage - I guess my grandfather was judged to be a good provider by my grandmother's folks

They're just a bit behind us - stuck in semi-feudal serfdom (god knows if they'll ever get out of it - it just doesn't suit the rich elite to emancipate the average Issan farm laborer)

So - who likes boobies?  

shit i had no idea you were indian mick

[guydesavoy]

(jimslim @ Aug. 18 2009,23:49) The Thai view of "taking care " and all that comes with it is alien to most of us and makes us suspicious , because we have money they do not .

Another aspect alien to the popular western concept of love is the Thai (LB) predeliction for screwing around at almost any opportunity.

Something about giving the one they 'love' all their heart, but having many hearts to give...

[f0xxee]

I don't know that they do screw around so much.... I think less so than falangs.

[halla]

I thought that it was mainly just on here that fucking around behind your wifes/gfs back was applauded. But almost everybody I know who have a thai gf cheats on them, and does not try to hide it. Ting tong farangs

[guydesavoy]

oops sorry

[guydesavoy]

I guess that participating in these kinds of Forums and this 'lifestyle', one could easily get that impression.

However, many years of hearing of others' experiences directly and vicariously and talking to many Thais LBs seem to indicate that the swing factor in Thailand is a given rather than a product of the company one keeps   (Oh, and I've seen it myself too   )

With some rare exceptions of course. But as the French say : the exception proves the rule