Third gender by On Nutter
Published January 31st, 2008 in Reader Submissions. (source: http://www.2thebigmango.com/reader-s...tter/#more-602 )
Who really understands ladyboys? They are everywhere in Thailand and seem to be multiplying in Bangkok. They are perceived at best as a freak show and at worst as dangerous thieves. But what really lies behind the outrageous exhibitionism of Thailand€™s third gender?
I had the chance to dig a little deeper when I was asked by Sukhumvit Eye, a new monthly magazine, to interview a ladyboy for a feature article. Perhaps because of the misgivings many farangs have about katoeys, I could not find a friend to accompany me on my mission as I headed to Guess Bar, the ladyboy beer bar that relocated recently to Sukhumvit Soi 4, near the Raja Hotel, following the demise of Sukhumvit 1 Plaza where it was previously housed.
It was relatively painless. Guess Bar has a good atmosphere and decent music. A few farangs were playing pool. The ladyboys were flouncing around and having fun. Some were energetically. It didn€™t have the oppressive vibe of a Nana Plaza ladyboy gogo bar I had visited. In fact, I must have been seated at the bar for all of 10 seconds before Bang came up and grabbed my wedding tackle.
€œI like you,€ she lied unconvincingly while tossing back her hair in the way that ladyboys do when they are not touching their hair. I came straight to the point and told her I was looking for a ladyboy who would agree to be interviewed and photographed. €œI will do it,€ she said without hesitation. €œBuy me a drink.€
The interview began at the bar but I was constantly interrupted by the groping hands and suggestive poses of Bang€™s far-from-shy colleagues. Life can be difficult as a sex object. We decided it would be best to go outside.
Bang gave me a summary of her life. She is 22 and from Kalasin in Isaan and has been living in Bangkok for seven years. She has one brother and two sisters. Her first job was with a company that made wedding costumes. Three years ago, she moved into the nightlife industry by working at two ladyboy venues, Cascade in Nana Plaza and King€™s Castle 3 in Patpong, before switching to Guess.
€œI knew from a very young age that I wanted to be a lady. I was probably only five or six when I started wearing girls€™ clothes. My family understood and there were never any problems with them about it. I have always liked sexy men and I had one or two boyfriends in Kalasin,€ she explained.
€œWhen I first went with a customer, I could not speak English very well. I was shy and did not really know what to do. He asked me to give him a blow-job. It was OK. I soon learned what customers like. I have never had a problem with a customer. They have all been fine and treated me well.
€œFour years ago, I had a breast implant that cost 40,000 baht. I also spent 25,000 baht to have surgery on my hips. At one time I wanted to have a pussy, but not now. I am happy with what I have. I don€™t think I will change. A few years ago, most ladyboys wanted to have a pussy, but things have changed. Most farangs don€™t mind if we don€™t have a pussy. It is not something we worry about.
€œThailand is a very open society. I think that is why there are so many ladyboys. People want to know everything about us and what we do. Many ladyboys are considered to be very beautiful and we also have a reputation for being very good at applying make-up. We take good care of ourselves.€
Having revealed that she was of the pre-op variety, Bang emphasised the point by lifting her skirt and presenting a sight that will haunt me to my grave €“ black lace panties trying manfully, but failing, to accommodate meat and two veg. Let€™s just say that there was a bad case of gusset bulge and the veg were protruding from the lingerie. €œEveryone in here has a cock,€ she said matter-of-factly as she pointed at about 20 of her colleagues dotted around Guess Bar.
Bang has an Austrian boyfriend who sometimes sends her up to 45,000 baht a month. He travels a lot in his business and visits Bangkok at least three times a year, but Bang accepts that they have no future together. She is looking for more than money.
€œHe is very generous and has bought me lots of clothes and other presents, all brand names. He is crazy about talking on the phone. When he comes to Thailand, he takes me to a very nice hotel and to dinner. He is about 25 years older than me. I know he is a butterfly and goes with many ladyboys. I don€™t love him and I have decided to finish with him. I don€™t care about him; I care about my life and my family. I send as much money to my family every month as I can afford.
€œI am happy with myself. I am happy with my life. As for the future, I would like to live with a farang. I enjoy working in Guess Bar. I have good friends here. We all get along very well. I share a room with one of my friends from the bar and I don€™t have any friends who are not ladyboys. I don€™t care about girls in other bars or what they think. I am easy and want everything to be easy.€
Bang€™s ambitions seem remarkably similar to those of those of the bargirls working in Bangkok€™s conventional venues: sending money to their families, hoping a farang will come along to provide financial security and enjoying life with the support group of their bar colleagues.
Despite Thailand€™s reputation for tolerance, ladyboys still inspire fear and loathing from some parts of the farang community. Without a market for their services, there would not be so many working in nightlife areas (there are four ladyboy bars in Nana Plaza alone), but katoey still operate on the fringes. Even those men who enjoy their company tend to more discreet than regular punters. So who are their customers?
€œMany customers are married men,€ said Bang. €œThey are not gay but just want to try something different. If they go with a lady, they can usually just have sex in the pussy or a blow-job. If they go with a ladyboy, they can do more things. They can fuck me in the ass, but some like me to fuck them in the ass and others like to give me a blow-job. I like it when farangs give me a blow-job. I like to have an orgasm. Every time it is easy for me.
€œMost men find that getting a blow-job from a ladyboy is a better experience than a blow-job from a lady. It is a different feeling. Ladyboys can do everything. Many men find the sex better than they are used to with a lady. Some are scared that people will think they are gay, but they are not really gay.
€œI am not a lucky girl. I am a bad girl who has to work. But I am happy and try to make my customers happy. If I could be born again, I would like to be born as a girl, not a boy. Every ladyboy would tell you the same.€
Sukhumvit Eye is a monthly magazine aimed at expats.
For more information go to www.sukhumviteye.com.
Published January 31st, 2008 in Reader Submissions. (source: http://www.2thebigmango.com/reader-s...tter/#more-602 )
Who really understands ladyboys? They are everywhere in Thailand and seem to be multiplying in Bangkok. They are perceived at best as a freak show and at worst as dangerous thieves. But what really lies behind the outrageous exhibitionism of Thailand€™s third gender?
I had the chance to dig a little deeper when I was asked by Sukhumvit Eye, a new monthly magazine, to interview a ladyboy for a feature article. Perhaps because of the misgivings many farangs have about katoeys, I could not find a friend to accompany me on my mission as I headed to Guess Bar, the ladyboy beer bar that relocated recently to Sukhumvit Soi 4, near the Raja Hotel, following the demise of Sukhumvit 1 Plaza where it was previously housed.
It was relatively painless. Guess Bar has a good atmosphere and decent music. A few farangs were playing pool. The ladyboys were flouncing around and having fun. Some were energetically. It didn€™t have the oppressive vibe of a Nana Plaza ladyboy gogo bar I had visited. In fact, I must have been seated at the bar for all of 10 seconds before Bang came up and grabbed my wedding tackle.
€œI like you,€ she lied unconvincingly while tossing back her hair in the way that ladyboys do when they are not touching their hair. I came straight to the point and told her I was looking for a ladyboy who would agree to be interviewed and photographed. €œI will do it,€ she said without hesitation. €œBuy me a drink.€
The interview began at the bar but I was constantly interrupted by the groping hands and suggestive poses of Bang€™s far-from-shy colleagues. Life can be difficult as a sex object. We decided it would be best to go outside.
Bang gave me a summary of her life. She is 22 and from Kalasin in Isaan and has been living in Bangkok for seven years. She has one brother and two sisters. Her first job was with a company that made wedding costumes. Three years ago, she moved into the nightlife industry by working at two ladyboy venues, Cascade in Nana Plaza and King€™s Castle 3 in Patpong, before switching to Guess.
€œI knew from a very young age that I wanted to be a lady. I was probably only five or six when I started wearing girls€™ clothes. My family understood and there were never any problems with them about it. I have always liked sexy men and I had one or two boyfriends in Kalasin,€ she explained.
€œWhen I first went with a customer, I could not speak English very well. I was shy and did not really know what to do. He asked me to give him a blow-job. It was OK. I soon learned what customers like. I have never had a problem with a customer. They have all been fine and treated me well.
€œFour years ago, I had a breast implant that cost 40,000 baht. I also spent 25,000 baht to have surgery on my hips. At one time I wanted to have a pussy, but not now. I am happy with what I have. I don€™t think I will change. A few years ago, most ladyboys wanted to have a pussy, but things have changed. Most farangs don€™t mind if we don€™t have a pussy. It is not something we worry about.
€œThailand is a very open society. I think that is why there are so many ladyboys. People want to know everything about us and what we do. Many ladyboys are considered to be very beautiful and we also have a reputation for being very good at applying make-up. We take good care of ourselves.€
Having revealed that she was of the pre-op variety, Bang emphasised the point by lifting her skirt and presenting a sight that will haunt me to my grave €“ black lace panties trying manfully, but failing, to accommodate meat and two veg. Let€™s just say that there was a bad case of gusset bulge and the veg were protruding from the lingerie. €œEveryone in here has a cock,€ she said matter-of-factly as she pointed at about 20 of her colleagues dotted around Guess Bar.
Bang has an Austrian boyfriend who sometimes sends her up to 45,000 baht a month. He travels a lot in his business and visits Bangkok at least three times a year, but Bang accepts that they have no future together. She is looking for more than money.
€œHe is very generous and has bought me lots of clothes and other presents, all brand names. He is crazy about talking on the phone. When he comes to Thailand, he takes me to a very nice hotel and to dinner. He is about 25 years older than me. I know he is a butterfly and goes with many ladyboys. I don€™t love him and I have decided to finish with him. I don€™t care about him; I care about my life and my family. I send as much money to my family every month as I can afford.
€œI am happy with myself. I am happy with my life. As for the future, I would like to live with a farang. I enjoy working in Guess Bar. I have good friends here. We all get along very well. I share a room with one of my friends from the bar and I don€™t have any friends who are not ladyboys. I don€™t care about girls in other bars or what they think. I am easy and want everything to be easy.€
Bang€™s ambitions seem remarkably similar to those of those of the bargirls working in Bangkok€™s conventional venues: sending money to their families, hoping a farang will come along to provide financial security and enjoying life with the support group of their bar colleagues.
Despite Thailand€™s reputation for tolerance, ladyboys still inspire fear and loathing from some parts of the farang community. Without a market for their services, there would not be so many working in nightlife areas (there are four ladyboy bars in Nana Plaza alone), but katoey still operate on the fringes. Even those men who enjoy their company tend to more discreet than regular punters. So who are their customers?
€œMany customers are married men,€ said Bang. €œThey are not gay but just want to try something different. If they go with a lady, they can usually just have sex in the pussy or a blow-job. If they go with a ladyboy, they can do more things. They can fuck me in the ass, but some like me to fuck them in the ass and others like to give me a blow-job. I like it when farangs give me a blow-job. I like to have an orgasm. Every time it is easy for me.
€œMost men find that getting a blow-job from a ladyboy is a better experience than a blow-job from a lady. It is a different feeling. Ladyboys can do everything. Many men find the sex better than they are used to with a lady. Some are scared that people will think they are gay, but they are not really gay.
€œI am not a lucky girl. I am a bad girl who has to work. But I am happy and try to make my customers happy. If I could be born again, I would like to be born as a girl, not a boy. Every ladyboy would tell you the same.€
Sukhumvit Eye is a monthly magazine aimed at expats.
For more information go to www.sukhumviteye.com.
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